An "average" partnership gets better results – and the people involved actually report greater satisfaction – than people working alone. Gallup’s latest research released in 2009 indicates that although many in the workplace today will sadly report never having had a productive and satisfying partnership, as human beings we’re actually made for collaboration – and we can learn to get better at doing it!

My own experience as a business coach over the past 15 years has shown me that without exception, my clients crave the kind of business relationships that lighten their load, get them where they’re going faster and with better quality outcomes, and free them up to do more of what they love and do well. Unfortunately, it’s also true that most of us attest to having only moderate success in developing the kind of collaboration with others that actually gets us there.

Over the next few weeks, we’ll be taking a look at some of the partnership stressors – the things that tend to keep you from exploiting the potential of your business relationships, and what you can do about them by developing sets of relaxers. The result is a system to create renewable energy sources for your collaborative efforts.

Think of the partnership stress index as a thermometer with a range of 1-10. A low stress group would be 1-3, middle group 4-7 and high stress 9-10. We all need stress to survive – so having a stress level of 0 is not an option. Once you reach 9 or 10, though, a breakdown is imminent. The healthiest level would be a 1-3.1 Your partnership stress index is calculated by adding up the positive values of your stressors and subtracting the relative negative values of your relaxers. Consider partnership stressors and partnership relaxers as situations, attitudes and behaviors (internal as well as external) that affect your results.

To get started, let’s take a look at 3 top stressors related to communication between and among partners in a business relationship. First, imagine what it feels like to be "out of touch" with your partner. This is the same sensation you might have with a teenage son or daughter – where you are literally are different pages with respect to what’s important. The sense of disconnect is seen in conflicting priorities, urgency and how you choose to spend your time. Instead of feeling supported, the weight of responsibility seems to be square on your shoulders. Misunderstanding pops up a lot when you’re "out of touch". Consider a regular practice of checking in with your partner as an antidote or relaxer. Check in before meetings to gauge what might get in the way of a productive meeting. And check in literally on a regular basis to stay focused.

A second stressor is being "out of sync" – timing is everything. When you’re on the same page, but just have a different idea of the appropriate placement of an activity, initiative or event, you’re liable to sputter and jerk as you try to coordinate actions. I have clients who find it almost impossible to sync their schedules for important meetings and often find themselves behind on deadlines while waiting for each other to provide information or complete tasks. A solution for syncing up is to be realistic when projecting when a project or outcome is likely to be completed. A watch out here is not to "pad" schedules, but to discuss potential breakdowns frankly up front.

A third stressor in this category is being "out of reach". Long stretches of silence, unreturned phone calls and emails, and sudden changes of plans by one partner or the other make it difficult to stay on track in a business relationship.

You’ll often hear a partner excusing this behavior because he/she was "waiting to be sure…, to hear from a supplier, or to see if something else comes through" before responding. Don’t wait – update, update, update. Don’t leave your partner in the dark just because you don’t have all the details. You’ll alleviate not only your stress but also your partner’s when you have a shared understanding of what’s going on.

So if you experience any one of these 3 stressors on a regular basis – give yourself 2 points on the Partnership Stress Index for each. When you begin to use one or more of the tips as relaxers, you can chalk up some negative points to balance out your total. Just being aware of the tension you’re causing yourself and your partner is a great first step.

To access a Free Partnership Stress Test, go to www.intentionalbusinesspartnerships.com or visit the 'Intentional Business Partnerships' Facebook Page