Good listening and communications skills are crucial to successful parenting. However, it can be a daunting thing to do now and then. We can say A, yet they thought it's B; they say C, we thought it's D. This can be very frustrating thing. As a parent, you should make sure that you take the time to sit down and listen openly and discuss them honestly about their views and opinions.

It appears to be a natural tendency to react rather than to respond. Our feelings and experiences affect our judgement. However, if we want our child to express themselves openly and honestly without fear of repercussion from us, we must be receptive to our child's feelings and emotions - thus being responding. By reacting, we send our child the message that their feelings and opinions are wrong. To opens a dialog that allows them to discuss their feelings further, and provides you a better understanding of where they're coming from, we must be responding and don’t hesitate to ask questions about why the child feels that way. Responding also gives you an opportunity to work out a solution or a plan of action with your child that maybe they would not have figure out on their own. Your child will also value the fact that perhaps you do indeed understand how they feel.

It's necessary in these situations to give your child your full and undivided attention. Put down your newspaper, stop doing dishes, or turn off the television so you can hear the full situation and make eye contact with your child. Keep calm, be inquisitive, and afterwards offer potential solutions to the problem.

Don't discourage your child from feeling upset, angry, or frustrated. Our initial instinct may be to say or do something to steer our child away from it, but this can be a detrimental tactic. Again, listen to your child, ask questions to find out why they are feeling that way, and then offer potential solutions to alleviate the bad feeling.

Just as we do, our children have feelings and experience difficult situations. By actively listening and participating with our child as they talk about it, it demonstrates to them that we do care, we want to help and we have similar experiences of our own that they can draw from. Remember, respond - don't react.