Kids are generally unpredictable. Parents who have kids that are displaying bad, obnoxious and abusive behavior find it a big struggle to discipline their children especially when these parents don’t know how their kids will think or respond to situations. Because of this, most parents agree in thinking that their roles would be a whole lot easier if they could just know what makes their children tick.

The Total Transformation Program by Dr. James Lehman advises parents to take a look at the characteristics and practices of children with obnoxious and abusive behavior. Parents spend a great half of their lives in raising their children; the other half is spent on how to actually deal with them. So as parents, it is important that you get to know how your child behaves and what characteristics or practices he/she shows in order for you to know how to deal with the situation properly. It becomes all the more important when it involves the child’s bad, obnoxious and abusive behavior.

Parents should be able to identify and understand each and every characteristic and practice that their child displays and should distinguish these characteristics separately and accordingly. As what researches in the field of cognitive learning tell us, we learn by what we observe in others. So parents are expected to also learn a great deal about their children by observing how they behave and respond to situations. Parents need not worry about the good characteristics because it’s the bad characteristics and practices that they should keep an eye on.

What parents usually fail to recognize is that these characteristics and practices are actually what the kid has and are not caused by the faults the parent has. When children pin the blame on you about the way they acted do not be fooled or mislead. It isn’t your fault. This practice of putting the blame on others is just one of the many characteristics and practices you could encounter when dealing with a child that shows bad, obnoxious and abusive behavior.

Good assessments on their children’s behaviors help in giving parents get a clear picture of how to deal with their children. But mind you guys because to be able to assess the problem is only half the battle being one. What comes next is how to properly handle these characteristics and practices in a manner that doesn’t harm the relationship between parent and child.

Author Dan Roam once said that "whoever best describes the problem is the one most likely to solve it." Once the parent is able to define the problem correctly, it won’t take long for them to be able to also define the proper solution. It’s because the problem drives the solution, not the other way around.

This task of identifying the characteristics and practices that a child displays is agreeably not as easy as pie. Parents need to break down the problem so that they can be able to see how these kids think and act. They shouldn’t get discouraged because fact of the matter is these problems are treatable, solvable problems. And as meaningful, well-loving parents you can do something about this problem.