Internet supplanting real life relationships

Social IssuesDating

  • Author Ruslan Potokin
  • Published September 29, 2010
  • Word count 839

When dating services just started to appear on the Internet, single people were rather cautious at first and weren’t much enthusiastic to look for a potential partner on the Internet. Years have gone by, and dating sites on the Internet are growing like mushrooms after a rainy day. Nowadays it no longer seems like a desperate measure, and a large number of adult singles are registering on dating sites to find their love. Or is it so? Dating sites have debased relationships to an entirely new level. Supplanting them, they have perverted the very idea of these relations.

On the surface it may appear that a huge number of available online dating sites give a fantastic opportunity to find someone special. For most single people however it is completely the opposite. There are two types of people who are turning to dating sites: those who are seeking a mate, a kindred soul, ready to praise the heavens in hope to find that right person with the help of their computer. The other type of people – those who allowed the world of online dating suck them into a black hole of sham relationships, passionless dates and a false, virtual reality, where the only thing that matters is how many messages you receive, and not with how many people you meet in real life.

The new generation of singles is a bunch of chronic users of dating sites. Having started to use them, they became masters of filling out forms. They talk remarkably well about their appeal, about their fantastic lifestyle and a desire to meet someone with whom they could share their lives. This is all done just to win the game – a game in which you want to attract as many people as possible. They can sit at their computer indefinitely chatting with two, three, four partners at a time. For them it’s just a game.

With all these relationships, when everyone chats and sends emails to a large number of people simultaneously, some of them tend to forget why they do it in the first place. Since the Internet is all about virtual relationships, supplanted real life meetings have already ceased to be the main goal. Many prefer to remain hidden behind their computer screens. This allows them to be anyone – not necessarily dishonest, but at least to be safe. This is a place where they don’t have to show their weaknesses, where no one sees that their appearance is not as attractive as on the photos, where there is no need to make any effort that a real date involves.

‘Virtual’ dates have become a bad habit – and people are no longer worried about the actual dates. It’s easier for them to communicate through a computer – they can sit the whole night in their pajamas, eat potato chips and watch TV while interacting with their "partner". It already seems to be too complicated for them to dress properly, come to the meeting place and carry on a conversation with someone face to face. Why should they? Internet gives them a terrific opportunity to feel desirable, attractive and popular. God forbid they attempt to meet in real life – they are afraid of this.

It’s really sad when someone you are interested in answers: "I’ll msg you, we’ll chat" and you have to turn on your computer in hope that your ideal partner will offer you a real date. This situation has become so critical that people are almost shocked when they receive a real phone call from one of their contacts. Some of them even freeze for a moment. They are so accustomed to type in the silence that they forget how to use their own voice.

In addition, the Internet can be used not only by single people. The percentage may vary, but almost on every dating site there are also married men and women. And they do not look for a real partner. They simply count the number of messages they receive, the number of contacts they added to their MSN messenger. And those people who chat with them will probably never learn about their marital status, because they will probably never meet in real life. They are perfectly fine with online chatting.

Young people who are not old enough to use dating sites just yet are the only ones who still have a chance. I hope they will continue to see and meet each other in real life since the generation that is already bogged down in the computer world has little hope. Having lost their feelings and having turned into some kind of computer drones, they completely forgot why they do all this in the first place. The art of catching someone’s glance, the anxiety at the thought of how to approach the object of your obsession, it’s an amazing feeling when that person smiles, hearing your name … all these are things of the past; we live in a very sad world of virtual relationships.

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