Male Chastity FAQ - The Seven Most Commonly Asked Questions

Social IssuesSexuality

  • Author Sarah Jameson
  • Published October 7, 2010
  • Word count 1,059

In this quick Male Chastity FAQ I want to tackle the 7 most pressing questions couples who read my Free guide and blog ask me over and over again.

There is a lot more to the lifestyle naturally, however in my experience the answers to these seven questions will see you set off on this delicious way of life without stumbling into some of the most common traps many couples come across.

  1. My Lover Has Told Me He Wants to Be Locked in Chastity. Has He Gone Mad?

No. Well, it's possible, of course, yet highly questionable that this has anything to do with his desires.

Male chastity and male orgasm denial are astoundingly common fantasies for men, for reasons anyone who doesn't share that fantasy might never understand.

But that's all OK - since we don't have to comprehend it or share it for us to enjoy the benefits (more on these later in this male chastity FAQ).

For now, suffice it to say it's a frequent fantasy and so long as your relationship is fundamentally sound it will almost certainly bring you a lot of enjoyment and has the potential to improve your whole relationship and other areas of your life.

  1. Does a Need for Male Chastity and Orgasm Denial Mean My Lover is a Closet Submissive?

Not necessarily. He could be a submissive, of course, although that doesn't necessarily follow from his desire to hand over to you control of his orgasms.

Most husbands want to improve their relationships and their love lives (we all know it can become a bit stale and boring over time, don't we? it's not his fault - or yours - it's just the way we're made. Male chastity and male orgasm denial is one way among many to make things better as it tends to make you both behave the way you used to when you were first together.

Of all the things to take away from this male chastity FAQ, this is probably the second-most crucial .

Even so, even if your man is submissive, male submissiveness lies on a continuum and isn't a simple case of either/or. Many - the majority, in fact - men wish to be submissive in the bedroom only, and have no desire for all the extreme "female-domination" scenarios you may have heard about.

  1. Will Male Chastity Repair a Damaged Marriage?

Probably not. Not by itself, at any rate.

If the previous myth was the second most crucial one to dismiss in this male chastity FAQ then this is #1!

If your marriage is not basically strong, if you don't make love because you loathe each other rather than because you just don't make the effort any more, then the overwhelming likelihood is male chastity and male orgasm denial are going to make it far, far worse.

Not the answer you were seeking, I know... but it's the truth.

  1. Can I Get a Belt, Lock Myself Away and Simply Give My Wife the Keys?

Well, the decision is yours, however I can't think of many worse things to do.

First, you have almost certainly had this fantasy for years.

But it's going to be something probably very new and unexpected to her

if you drop something like this on her without any warning whatsoever, then she really might think you've gone mad.

To her, you're suggesting something which from her point of view could mean a fundamental change in your marriage. She needs time to consider it all and get her head around the idea - and she might not want to play it at all

Bottom line: you've got to talk about it like an adult. Yes, I know you want an easy, simple and comfortable answer, but this is a male chastity FAQ and is meant to answer your questions and give good advice, not approval for silly ideas.

  1. How Can I Force My Wife to Play?

Not possible. And you don't want to even try.

Merely TELLING your partner about the benefits they will experience won't cut it. You have to SHOW them. That's the only way to get them to embrace the lifestyle.

It's beyond the remit of this male chastity FAQ to go into detail here, yet if you make it all about YOU - "I want... I want... I want...", then you likely won't get. Male chastity and male orgasm denial require hard work from.

It's not just about either one of you - it's two-way street.

  1. Do We Need a Belt to Play at Male Chastity and Male Orgasm Denial?

If you think you do... then you probably do; but, if you imagine you don't... then you don't.

Many couples very successfully use the "Honour" system (including John and me on many occasions).

If it works for you both, or it doesn't... then you know the answer.

There is no right and wrong way to do this - male chastity is a consensual lifestyle choice and there is no book of rules telling you what is and isn't "permissible".

And the final question in this male chastity FAQ...

  1. What's the Best Male Chastity Device for Me/My Lover to Wear?

The short answer is I don't know.

You may as well ask whether a Land Rover is a better car than a Rolls Royce

And the longer answer, then is "it depends".

If you want to drive off-road and ford deep rivers, then a Land Rover would be a better choice than a Rolls; but if you want something to impress a VIP, then a Rolls might be better.

Not only that, although different men's bodies react in different ways to the same devices.

Every different device has its own advantages and disadvantages which I won't go into in this male chastity FAQ.

In the main, I think it's reasonable to say a full belt tends to be more secure than a simple device, although then belts are also more costly.

In the end, though, you won't find out what suits you unless you give something a try.

It likely makes sense to start off (relatively) cheap and easy, say with a device like a CB3000 and then see how that suits you.

If that suits you, then great; if not, then you move on and try something else.

Bottom line: trial and error. There is no other answer.

Sarah Jameson, creator of and the woman behind the much admired Male Chastity FAQ is a freelance writer and happily married keyholder who first discovered the secrets of male chastity some 2 1/2 years ago. She now keeps her husband, John, in uncompromising and strict male chastity in a stainless-steel chastity belt.

You can get your own copy of Sarah's FREE Male Chastity FAQ from her Blog at http://www.malechastityblog.com/male-chastity-faq.

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