Ten Steps for Making A Great First Impression
- Author Brett Walker
- Published November 8, 2010
- Word count 877
Introduction
Whether we realise it or not we are always making a first impression on the people that we meet.
Sometimes, if we are meeting a special person or we're attending an important meeting, we may want to make more than a good impression - we may want to make a great one.
The impression is formed by the other person so that, to some extent, their opinion of us is out of our control. Even so, there are things that we can do to make our first impressions really good ones and to make great first impressions almost automatically.
The benefit of that will be enormous and will result in further conversations, favour with people, new personal and business relationships, greater success and more fulfilment in our business and personal lives.
So here are ten tips for making a great first impression:
1 Be on Time
Make sure that you're on time for any meeting. No-one likes to be kept waiting.
This is so important - if you're late you're starting off from a disadvantage.
2 Dress
Always ensure that you're dressed appropriately for the occasion. When you're not sure what to wear it's better to be too formal than too informal.
It's also important to have tidy nails and well-groomed hair.
3 Relax
If you're anxious or nervous people will not be attracted to you. Take the pressure off yourself by not worrying. Just be yourself - be genuine and real. Instead of thinking that you want the date, or new client, or the job, just relax. Train your mind to think positive thoughts and the result will be a happy face that attracts people.
4 Smile
A great smile really attracts people. They will think that you're happy to meet them. There's an old saying that goes, "smiles increase your face value". It's true.
Above all, smile with the eyes. Scientists have identified over 50 types of smiles, the most sincere of which is one that pushes up into the eyes. The muscles that we use when we smile with our eyes are involuntary. That means that they only become engaged in an authentic smile, not in a "courtesy" smile. That is the reason that it's considered more genuine to smile with the eyes.
5 Have a firm handshake
People are more likely to like and trust someone who has a firm handshake. It denotes a strong character, whereas a limp handshake is usually interpreted as weakness or lack of self-confidence, or even worse - a nasty character. Remember Uriah Heep in the Charles Dicken's novel, "David Copperfield". The character is notable for his cloying humility, obsequiousness, and insincerity and he had a handshake like a wet fish!
However, it's important to get the right balance because too strong a handshake can be interpreted as hostility.
Learn to give a good handshake. If necessary practice it with a friend until it becomes a habit. Here are some tips for getting it right:
-
Establish eye contact just before the handshake and maintain it throughout; it should last for 1-3 seconds;
-
Grip with your whole hand;
-
Shake your arm from the elbow.
6 Open Body Language
There is a closed body language and an open body language and how you say something is more important than what you say!
Here are some tips for maintaining open body language:
· if there are any barriers between you and them, such as a chair, remove them;
· look them in the eyes;
· don't cross your legs;
· keep your palms open;
· turn your whole body towards them.
7 Be interested in the other person
Show interest in the other person by asking questions and talking less. This helps you learn more about the other person and endears you to them.
Many people think that to make a great first impression you have to display your knowledge or tell people who you know or what you've done. In fact it's more important to show interest in the other person.
8 Make eye contact
Making eye contact when talking with someone is very important.
Failure to do so can be interpreted that you're shy or rude or bored.. Conversely, making eye contact for a long time can be regarded that you're very outgoing or aggressive or over-confident.
So it's important to get it right. Here are some tips to help you:
· relax
· concentrate on one eye at a time
· avoid staring
It's especially important to do this when attending a job interview, otherwise the interviewer may think that you're being shifty and will be reluctant to employ you.
9 Be confident.
If you're relaxed and confident you will project self-assurance, which people will find attractive.
If you don't feel confident act confident and after a while you will begin to feel confident! In addition, learn not to worry about what others think of you as long as you always try to do your best and keep a clear conscience.
10 Be in the moment.
Concentrate on the person you are with rather than thinking about the next person to meet. It isn't about you - it's about the other person.
It's a paradox that we make a good impression by focussing on the other person instead of ourselves. Remember these ten steps and you will make a great first impression most of the time.
Brett Walker lives in London with his wife and two daughters. He believes in the "Whole Person Approach" to success and helped produce "The Successful Living Handbook" . Find out more and sign Up For Brett Walker's Newsletter by visiting his website at: http://www.brettwalkeronline.com
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