Three Steps to Bounce Back After Negative Feedback, and Look Good Afterward
- Author Crystal Jonas
- Published November 3, 2010
- Word count 456
Depending on what you do, you can actually look good after getting negative feedback.
For professional development, the fastest way to improve on the job is to listen to and act on feedback. Unfortunately, not everyone delivers negative feedback well, which makes listening with an open mind harder.
However, regardless of how the ideas are delivered, it's to the listener's advantage to stay tuned in for potentially helpful information. While it feels great when the boss loves absolutely everything you're doing, how do you know what adjustments to make if you don't hear new ideas? Those new ideas call for you to change your current way of doing things.
Sometimes it's hard not to take criticism personally. The goal is to set aside the urge to defend yourself and to be receptive to the input that can help you improve quickly. You do like quick results don't you? This article will show you not only how to feel better and perform better after negative feedback, but it will show you how your response to criticism can actually make you look good, so you can be respected even more than you are now.
To look good after negative feedback, and to use the information as an opportunity for rapid professional growth, there are three steps you need to remember:
Step One: When you get negative feedback ask yourself "Is this fact or opinion?" With this initial step, you're getting some emotional distance which helps you not take the criticism too personally.
Step Two: Ask yourself: "Does this opinion matter in this context?" First, of course, if your boss said it, it matters! Second, notice the words "in this context." You'll want to remind yourself that in paying attention to the feedback of others, you consider their comments in the right "context." For example, your boss may say you're pushy in meetings. This doesn't mean when you're with friends you cannot be the same blunt, call-it-like-you-see-it person you've always been. That's a different context, yes?
Step Three: Say out loud your version of this: "I've never looked at it that way. What suggestions do you have for me in the future?" Let's say you're the boss, and you give someone you manage this feedback, "Chris, the degree to which you were assertive in that meeting isn't working in your favor." Chris says, "Wow, I'd hadn't looked at it like that before. What tips do you have for me in the future?" Wow! How would you perceive Chris?
Perhaps you're thinking you'd see Chris as respectful, professional, interested in improving, open to your input. Exactly. And that's exactly how you will be perceived when you follow these three steps for bouncing back and even looking good after negative feedback.
Crystal Jonas, "The People Skills Lady" Teaches people to express themselves at their best so they can be more productive and profitable. For info on speaking or coaching with Crystal, go to http://crystalconsults.com Email crystal and sign up for her free newsletters while you're there.
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