Temper tantrums and toddlers usually go hand in hand, as any parent of a toddler will surely know.

But knowing exactly what’s behind your child’s mini meltdown can go a long way in helping you diffuse the situation – while keeping your sanity!

There are many different reasons for toddler temper tantrums, but the main ones generally tend to be as follows.

Frustration

A young child’s language ability often develops at a slower pace than their mental skills, and consequently they’re unable to articulate effectively what it is they want or need.

Try putting yourself in your toddler’s shoes for a moment. Think about how frustrating it must be not to be able to make yourself understood!

Lots of empathy and reassurance are the best ways of dealing with frustration-type temper tantrums and teach your child that they can come to you whenever they need support or assistance.

Tiredness

Tiredness is another common cause of temper tantrums in young children.

I know from experience that it can be tempting to let your little one skip their daytime nap if you’re busy and have places to go to and things to do.

But if your child is used to having a little snooze through the day, depriving them of it usually results in one grouchy, unhappy little camper!

Try to factor in some time for them to rest each day and you should find they’re less liable to fly off the handle at the slightest little thing!

Independence

Watching your child develop from a little baby who relies on you to do everything for them to an independent toddler is fascinating and highly rewarding. But it often comes with a whole new set of challenges!

Now you’re dealing with an autonomous little person who knows their own mind and has very firm opinions on what they do and don’t want. Cue several temper tantrums which involve a battle of wills between them and you!

In such situations, I’ve found that it can help if you let your child feel that they are in control.

For instance, rather than struggling to get them to put on a jacket, give them of choice of 2 and let them decide which one they want to wear. Your toddler feels like they’ve been part of the decision-making process and have gotten their own way – although you know differently!

Attention

A final common cause of toddler temper tantrums is to seek attention.

Young children crave attention from you, and it matters not to them whether it’s positive or negative.

If you suspect your toddler is playing up simply to provoke a response from you, keep your reactions to a minimum. Instead, shower them with praise and recognition for positive behaviour and hopefully they will soon come to learn that being naughty doesn’t get them the results they want.