How To Keep A First Conversation Going Strong

Social IssuesDating

  • Author Bellaisa Filippis
  • Published May 12, 2011
  • Word count 541

Whether you have just met someone or you are on your first date with them, that first conversation is going to make or break whether you talk to them again. Conversation in the beginning is what brings the two of you together and allows your interest in each other to develop. You may lose their interest very quickly if you are always producing awkward silences or find yourself talking about inappropriate things.

The good news is that there's always something to talk about! And there's always something to talk about that will keep the interest of your date. You just have to know how to look for it!

First remember that people only mention stuff that is on their mind or that they are interested in. Generic yes and no answers are few and far between. Most of the time there will be a reference in the response to something they are interested in.

Let's pretend like you just saw the love of your life at a party. You walk up to them and say "Are you having a good time?" and they say "Totally, I love this music!" Now what would you say at this point? Which one of the following statements or questions would be the most natural thing to talk about to keep the conversation going strong and interesting for THEM? Would you start talking about:

  1. How you plan to drink yourself silly tonight!

  2. Ask them another question about the party.

  3. Ask them if the always go to parties.

  4. Ask them what kind of music they like.

Did you answer 4? If you did you were right!

The first response is more about you and your night and that may lose their interest very quickly. The second response is leading to a dead-end. There are only so many questions about the party you can ask before you run out of things to say! The third response is rolling the dice towards a dead-end conversation. They may respond with a one word answer and find that question kind of lame.

The most natural thing to talk about would be the music because they already gave you an opening to that conversation. They could have mentioned the drinks, atmosphere, other people, or even the disgusting smell of the place, but they chose to mention the music. This means that they have some interest in the music and would be willing to talk more about that interest.

The key is to listen to what they say, pick up on some key words, and keep the conversation going with those key words.

So if the conversation about music leads into a direction about how they saw an amazing DJ in Italy, then you can start talking about Italy! You will literally not run out of things to say with this method even if you try to.

Keep your ears open for that one word that describes something they are interested in or are thinking about, and also would be a great bridge to a brand new topic of discussion, and you will always hold your own for interesting conversation.

Wondering if that new person is interested in you? Visit Bellaisa's website for some signs of attraction that you won't be able to miss!

Bellaisa's website, the Relationship Circle, is all about fixing relationship problems for healthier and happier relationships.

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