This happens and it’s not a silly question.

There may come a time in your relationship with a big beautiful woman where she utters the most awful of four letter words - diet. Even though you love the size and shape of your large and lovely lady it doesn't matter unless she feels the same way about herself. So what happens when she wants to lose weight and you want her to stay where she is? Her weight is part of the reason you were attracted to her in the first place and you worry that if that changes it will end your love affair. It's similar to how a man who likes long hair would feel if his girl got a pixie cut or when a guy who likes petite women falls in love with someone who starts to gain weight. But in all those situations the key is that even though you are in love you aren't in possession of another persons body. They still have the right to make their own choices. By trying to manipulate them into doing what you want you are showing disrespect for your woman and your relationship.

Your first instinct may be to try and sabotage her efforts to lose weight. Don’t do it. You go out and stock the freezer with chocolate ice cream and stock the pantry with her favorite chips and dip. All that temptation will likely work if your goal is just to get her to fail to reach her goals, but the cost will be too great. By going behind her back and not supporting her in her goals you will be doing great harm to your relationship. It's understandable that you might feel upset or scared when your big beautiful woman says she wants to lose weight.

The best way to be supportive is by figuring out why they want to lose weight. If they are doing it because they want to conform for some societal standard of beauty then you can help by focusing on how big is beautiful and feminine and how it is more womanly to be shapely than to look like an emaciated teenage boy. This will strengthen your relationship and will make her abandon the diet. Maybe they want to lose weight to fit into a certain dress or for a special occasion. In that case usually we are talking about just 10 or 15 pounds and not a huge change. Being helpful by making low calorie foods and going for romantic walks together will help you grow as a couple as you reach that goal.

Often times the desire to lose weight may come because of health concerns. There is nothing inherently unhealthy about being a big woman as long as your blood sugar, cholesterol and blood pressure are all normal. The idea that thinner is healthier isn't always true. If your lady's main concern is health then you can encourage her to start eating more fruits and veggies, cutting back on sugar, and adding exercise to your daily routine. These small changes may result in a few pounds lost but more importantly it will lead to a longer and better quality of life all without having to resort to becoming a waif. These activities are good for you too. Think of it as taking action to live a longer life together. It is possible to be big, beautiful, and healthy but it will take your love and support.

When your large and lovely lady wants to slim down don't look at it as the end of your relationship and don't try and get in the way of her goals. Through communication and support you will be able to help her achieve her goals, of better self esteem or a healthier lifestyle, without losing her or too much of the body you've come to love. If you just can't accept that your woman wants to change then you need to take a step back and examine your relationship. Are you in love with a person or just her weight?