You're online and you have followed all our advice and now you are bombarded with potential dates. It's all exciting stuff. So what is the best way to manage the interest your brilliant profile has generated?

When you are contacted by one of the site members, here are some things to look out for before you respond. Remember, in profiles people can pretend to be someone their not, and they can be very convincing.

Apart form the obvious checking to see if their photo appeals to you, there are other things to look out for. See if there is a number of photo's in different situations, maybe with friends on holiday etc. The more the better, this will help you to know that the person is real (safety is critical) and gives you an idea of their life style. One photo is concerning because it might not be the person your replying to. If you are interested in this person ask for more photo's to be sent to your 'dating only free hotmail account'. It's not difficult to get a digital photo, cameras are everywhere, even in phones. If he or she refuses then walk away.

What Lies Beneath?

Next is deciphering their written profile. Notice what you are experiencing in you when you read the profile. What you really feel will be reflected in your gut feeling to what your reading, so listen to it. Of course everyone wants to come across as well as they can, but some do stretch the truth. Listen to you gut instinct, if you get an uncomfortable feeling when reading then stop and move on to the next profile.

Never make assumptions, these are killers for any relationship, (I will cover assumptions and their impact in a future post so look out for it). In profiles they can get you in quite a fix! E.g. you can create an expectation based only on your imagination about what you have read, and this can be a million miles from the actual truth. If you want a point in the profile qualified then ask, it will save a lot of time for both of you. If the feeling from what you have read is good then explore some more. Try to understand what the person is trying to tell you, and think up some questions that their profile has generated in you. Get as many facts until you feel comfortable.

The long and short of it!

Conversely if you are contacted by individuals who only comment on your picture (and men are worse for this) or they write a message that could fit anyone, be concerned as it could have been copied and pasted to 100's of women. What you are looking for is a message that you feel has been written to you, they have shown interest in your profile content and is straight to the point.

The initial message you write or receive should be short. Long first messages will not get read. Neither will a message that is too short. Men, please remember don't give a women a superficial few words like "your beautiful", "hot lady call me" or "I love your picture" from an online stranger these messages mean nothing, in fact worse than nothing. Whatever you write remember people are interested in people that are interested in them. Women on the whole are not interested in what car you drive, how much money you have or the fact that you wrestled crocodiles. Yes they want a man, but they want one who is interested in them. The material stuff comes second, anyone can be rich or strong but that does not make them a great partner.

Once you find some people you are interested in explore them by email through the dating site, and get all the information you need before you move onto the next level. Which could be a phone call or meeting. Please click safety for more information.

Who could be compatible with you?

It is very usual for individuals with a similar background and up-bringing to have a better chance of making a relationship work (of course there are always exceptions to the rule) so question what kind of life they are used to and what is important to them in life, in relationships, children and family, work etc... Please note all these question's can feel like an interview to the recipient. The fact is, it is an interview, but explore the question's in a chatty fun way, make it feel like genuine curiosity rather than an interrogation. The goal is to have fun together and still get the information you need.

If your looking for a serious relationship then you could consider this question. Great questions get great answers, so here's one to think about for you and maybe it's one you could ask your potential date.

"What's critical for you to have in a relationship for it to work for you?"

Critical means that if you don't have it then the relationship will fail! For example; it could be "honesty" we all want that, or it could be that the person has to be "solvent" or it could be "adventure" as without excitement you will stagnate. So if you're into getting out alot and all the other person wants is night after night in front of the TV your going to have a problem. Don't search for problems, just be honest with how you see your life and listen for the response.

Communication is the key, just imagine getting on great on email, the phone call was amazing, you meet and the chemistry is great. As the relationship goes on and you have now emotionally bonded, something comes up you didn't expect, and it's critical to you. For example the man now expects you to give up work as for him the woman's place is in the home and not the work place. For some this works but it might not work for you?

Have fun finding out about each other, but find out what is important to you. Remember you only get one life, relationships that go wrong usually are because of poor communication, lack of understanding, unclear boundaries and assumptions.

Start as you mean to go on, get it right and you could find the person you have always wanted.

Just imagine waking up every morning feeling lucky!

To get more out of Online Dating, Dating Tips, Body Language & Relationship Secrets click here and sign up for the free relationship advice newsletter.

Just Imagine....!