If you've ever read Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, you know that men and women think differently, especially when it comes to communication, dating, and relationships. Not only do men have different ideas about romance, love, and relationships, they also operate on completely different time frames. When you're head over heels in love with him, he may still be trying to get to know you. When you feel frustrated and are ready to move on, he may be getting ready to move the relationship forward. No matter how differently from us men operate, there is one great thing about them. As one of my married friends put it, Once a man is hooked, he is hooked! In other words, it takes a man much more time and effort to fall in love with someone, but once he believes that you are the one, there is very little turning back for him.

Getting a man to reach that in love stage, modern women face many difficulties. In the past there were very clear and socially accepted rules about dating. These rules developed based on male psychology and mens' need to be the pursuer, to be needed, and to be in control. Women understood their passive roles in dating and allowed the men to pursue them, court them, fall in love with them, and eventually marry them. Men understood exactly what protocol to follow.

Now things can be confusing. Women can assume the role of the pursuer. They find it perfectly acceptable to initiate dates with men, chase them, confess their feelings, and move things forward. Men, on the other hand, can be quite confused about what they need to do, since women are taking over their traditional role of pursuer.

Besides dating, men can also be a bit confused about what their role is in a relationship. In the past, men were the providers while the women were mothers and wives. In the modern age, women can have it all. They can be both breadwinner and wife. This progress for women confused men about what their role really is in a relationship, since it seems that women don't really need men anymore. All the talk about the difference between past and present is to show you that although modern women have achieved progress in in some areas, this has disrupted the old dating rules.

It may come as a surprise, but the old dating rules do have something going for them. To date successfully, modern women have to be aware of male psychology. I recommend the following strategies when it comes to dating:

• You can look alluring and enticing, but allow men to ask you out on a date. Men are most comfortable and most enthusiastic when they assume the role of pursuers.

• Keep it light and breezy at the beginning. Men are very competitive. They have a radar to detect pressure. If you come on too strong in the beginning you might send them running the other way!

• Operate in the same time frame as men. If he is slow to develop feelings towards you, don't confess your love to him too early. We all know that communication is easier when you're on the same page with someone. Also, by opening up slowly and in the same time frame as men, you avoid overwhelming him with your feelings and desires.

• Understand that men are slower to open up and can be more cautious than women. If you provide a secure, pressure-free, and light environment, men will open up to you. Moving too fast or demanding too much early on can make him shut down.

• Focus on the here and now. Have a good time with your man! If he always has a delightful time with you, you can be sure that he will come back for more!