How Are You Keeping Up With Your New Years Resolutions
Self-Improvement → Goal Setting
- Author Ghislaine Mahler
- Published February 16, 2009
- Word count 617
New Years resolutions mean new behavior! Human beings are made of habits, and of course when we make a resolution, at the beginning of the year or at any other time, we must change our habits. If we already did what is required to have the result we desire, we would be there now!
Generally, two to three weeks into creating a new habit is when we start slacking off ... how are YOU doing? Are you seeing yourself starting to procrastinate, skip a day here and there ... Is your commitment starting to fade?
The mind is a funny thing, isn't it? What I generally call our Inner-Critic is that part of our mind whose job it is to make sure we stay exactly where we are right now! "Stay small, don't change a thing!" If you've read my book Mastering Your Inner World, Your Doorway to an Empowered Life, you know that I have named my Inner Critic "Fred." Naming him makes it very easy for me to get into a conversation with "him." So, what name can you give that critical voice in your head? This process, which seems so simple is actually very powerful and it will enable you to take charge of your life. When choosing a name for your Inner-Critic, please do not choose the name of one of your parents or your childhood caretakers. You must understand that this part of you is in you, it is not someone else outside of you.
When Fred acts out and becomes a bit loud in my head, I just tell him: "Fred, do I need to remind you again that you are not in charge? You are welcome to bring me constructive ideas and suggestions, but keeping me small doesn't cut it for me. So, go take a hike, will you?" That sounds polite, but sometimes I am very direct and authoritative with him, because in the moment that is what is needed.
To be successful with your resolutions, you must change your behavior and habits. That means you must change the dialogue going on in your head all day long. To change that dialogue, you must first become aware of it. Here are the steps to achieve that awareness:
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Start paying attention to your thoughts. What kind of conversation are you having with yourself when you think of your big resolution?
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Tell yourself the truth, now! Sometimes you may be tempted to push away those thoughts because they aren't the thoughts you want to have. But how can you change your thoughts if you do not first acknowledge what's there, inside you, right now? So become willing to tell acknowledge your thoughts, even if you don't "like" or "approve" of them.
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Practice every day developing your self- awareness. If you find yourself procrastinating, just "witness" your thought process, that voice that tells you "oh, that's okay, you can do it tomorrow," or "well you can't do that now, look at all these other things you have to do that are way more important!"
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And, please do not beat yourself over that newly developed awareness, that's just another trick of your Inner-Critic. Know that you are in a new process that is going to bring you into a solution-mode. Just be kind and loving to yourself.
Change starts with developing awareness. Without awareness, you just continue running on a treadmill, using all your resources and going nowhere. Being in that place of awareness with something you don't like about yourself is probably uncomfortable or even painful, but know that you will be there just for a short while, and this step will definitely lead you to real and lasting change. So, go for it!
Ghislaine Mahler is an international certified Life and Executive Coach, a Personal Transformation Trainer and Author. She has dedicated the past 20 years to helping thousands of men and women lead their lives and create success from a place of inner-strength, confidence, authenticity, passion and joy. She is the author of "Mastering Your Inner World -- Your Doorway to Creating an Empowered Life." http://www.ghislainemahler.com
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