Dealing with Parental Stress

FamilyParenting

  • Author Trevor Dumbleton
  • Published September 18, 2005
  • Word count 828

One of the biggest problems with having children is the

remarkable fact that they tend to be the source of parental

stress. This is, obviously, the unique stress that comes

from being a parent and having to worry about the fact that

your kids are growing up, learning new things, living their

lives their own way, and -- all too often -- figuring out

things the hard way. In addition, you have to worry about

your kids making the right decisions, staying out of

trouble, and just generally turning into human beings just

like you. Needless to say, this tends to create a lot of

parental stress.

Being a parent isn't easy. After all, you are responsible

for raising, instructing, and helping children as they work

their way from an infant into adulthood. And even when

they go off on their own, you still worry about them as

they make their way through the world. Despite the fact

that they move on into adulthood, you never stop being a

parent and you want to make sure that they are doing okay.

Unfortunately, this is easier said than done and it is not

easy to let them go. Thus, you find yourself both trying

to give them freedom and trying to hang on to them as they

go out into the world.

The problem becomes one of both trying to keep a hold of

your children and trying to let them be their own people.

Thus, in order to allow you children to move on, you need

to learn to let them go. That's right, in order to ease

parental stress, you need to learn how to be less of a

parent. In fact, you need to learn how to let them make

their own mistakes. This is very difficult, since you will

have to watch them as they go through the process of

growing up, largely without your help. This can be very

difficult, since you will want to protect them from the

world. But the world will show up sometime and you will

need to let them learn to deal with it. Needless to say,

this will only make parental stress worse for a while,

since you will be essentially standing on the sidelines as

they make errors that you could have warned them against.

Just remember that it will do them good in the long run and

they will be better for it.

However, this does not mean that you shouldn't keep an eye

on your children. Let's face it, you are still a parent

and you need to watch over your children. Trying to cope

with parental stress will not be improved by being

completely ignorant of your children. Instead, let them be

themselves as you try to keep an eye on them. They will

find their own way, even if you do not always enjoy the

path that they have to go down to get there. Just allow

them to be imperfect and they will learn what they need to

know in the process.

But when the stress of child-raising gets to be too much,

don't be afraid to get help. There are plenty of support

groups, books, and websites out there that want to help you

through your parental stress. Don't be afraid to give them

a try, if for no other reason than to stay informed.

Nobody said it was going to be easy, so try to keep your

stress under control. Then, by keeping it under control,

you can survive a lot of difficult situations and a lot of

difficult years and prevent yourself from going crazy with

worry.

Just remember that your children will, eventually, become

rebellious and they will probably try to act in a way that

may shock you. It is well-known that parental stress can

be fairly severe during the teenage years, since teenagers

are always eager to go their own way. And if that doesn't

increase parental stress, nothing will. You will often

find yourself on the sideline, trying to figure out what is

going on in their heads, but try to remember that you were

their age once. Teenagers aren't perfect. Neither are

adults. Keep both of those items in mind and you may be

able to keep your parental stress to a minimum.

No, parental stress is not easy. No, it is not simple to

solve. No, there is no point where you can just let your

children go completely. However, by managing your own

parental stress, allowing your children to grow up, and

understanding that your children need to make their own

mistakes sometimes, you can keep your emotions under

control and allow your children to be themselves. So,

rather than allowing parental stress to take over your

life, let parental stress take a backseat to keeping an eye

on your children, making sure that they are doing fine, and

enjoying the years when they are growing from youth to

adulthood and beyond.

LowerYourStress.com: for everything to do with stress. Get

a free ebook to help with your stress levels:

http://www.loweryourstress.com/stress-book.html

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