Dealing with Parental Stress
- Author Trevor Dumbleton
- Published September 18, 2005
- Word count 828
One of the biggest problems with having children is the
remarkable fact that they tend to be the source of parental
stress. This is, obviously, the unique stress that comes
from being a parent and having to worry about the fact that
your kids are growing up, learning new things, living their
lives their own way, and -- all too often -- figuring out
things the hard way. In addition, you have to worry about
your kids making the right decisions, staying out of
trouble, and just generally turning into human beings just
like you. Needless to say, this tends to create a lot of
parental stress.
Being a parent isn't easy. After all, you are responsible
for raising, instructing, and helping children as they work
their way from an infant into adulthood. And even when
they go off on their own, you still worry about them as
they make their way through the world. Despite the fact
that they move on into adulthood, you never stop being a
parent and you want to make sure that they are doing okay.
Unfortunately, this is easier said than done and it is not
easy to let them go. Thus, you find yourself both trying
to give them freedom and trying to hang on to them as they
go out into the world.
The problem becomes one of both trying to keep a hold of
your children and trying to let them be their own people.
Thus, in order to allow you children to move on, you need
to learn to let them go. That's right, in order to ease
parental stress, you need to learn how to be less of a
parent. In fact, you need to learn how to let them make
their own mistakes. This is very difficult, since you will
have to watch them as they go through the process of
growing up, largely without your help. This can be very
difficult, since you will want to protect them from the
world. But the world will show up sometime and you will
need to let them learn to deal with it. Needless to say,
this will only make parental stress worse for a while,
since you will be essentially standing on the sidelines as
they make errors that you could have warned them against.
Just remember that it will do them good in the long run and
they will be better for it.
However, this does not mean that you shouldn't keep an eye
on your children. Let's face it, you are still a parent
and you need to watch over your children. Trying to cope
with parental stress will not be improved by being
completely ignorant of your children. Instead, let them be
themselves as you try to keep an eye on them. They will
find their own way, even if you do not always enjoy the
path that they have to go down to get there. Just allow
them to be imperfect and they will learn what they need to
know in the process.
But when the stress of child-raising gets to be too much,
don't be afraid to get help. There are plenty of support
groups, books, and websites out there that want to help you
through your parental stress. Don't be afraid to give them
a try, if for no other reason than to stay informed.
Nobody said it was going to be easy, so try to keep your
stress under control. Then, by keeping it under control,
you can survive a lot of difficult situations and a lot of
difficult years and prevent yourself from going crazy with
worry.
Just remember that your children will, eventually, become
rebellious and they will probably try to act in a way that
may shock you. It is well-known that parental stress can
be fairly severe during the teenage years, since teenagers
are always eager to go their own way. And if that doesn't
increase parental stress, nothing will. You will often
find yourself on the sideline, trying to figure out what is
going on in their heads, but try to remember that you were
their age once. Teenagers aren't perfect. Neither are
adults. Keep both of those items in mind and you may be
able to keep your parental stress to a minimum.
No, parental stress is not easy. No, it is not simple to
solve. No, there is no point where you can just let your
children go completely. However, by managing your own
parental stress, allowing your children to grow up, and
understanding that your children need to make their own
mistakes sometimes, you can keep your emotions under
control and allow your children to be themselves. So,
rather than allowing parental stress to take over your
life, let parental stress take a backseat to keeping an eye
on your children, making sure that they are doing fine, and
enjoying the years when they are growing from youth to
adulthood and beyond.
LowerYourStress.com: for everything to do with stress. Get
a free ebook to help with your stress levels:
http://www.loweryourstress.com/stress-book.html
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