Well, it started. I now have a daughter who has a computer in her

room. Still no TV, just a computer…It all started when we

decided to purchase a new computer for ourselves and were

subsequently faced with the dilemma of what and where to put our old

computer. After a lot of discussion and pleading from our eight

year old we decided to let her put the computer in her room. She

has been fascinated with computers since the age of 1 ½ and

regularly corresponds via email with her cousins, aunts, and

uncles. Once we got the computer set up in her room complete with

wireless internet access, we had to come to some decisions about how

to keep track of and monitor what she was doing on-line. It took

me one hour of research to realize how complicated it was going to

be and a few more weeks of research to figure out what to do. So,

here is our solution. What's yours?

The first point I want to make is there are no fail safe methods of

protecting your children from every "undesirable" on the web.

All options have their shortcomings and still require parental

monitoring to ensure little eyes aren't seeing more than they

should. Secondly, as parents we have a lot of choices in how we go

about protecting our kids. Choices range from complete blocking to

only establishing household rules. Your ultimate choice will

probably most depend on the age of your child and what you want as a

parent. Lastly, not only do we have to worry about what our kids

see when they "surf" the web, but we also have to worry about

instant messaging and chat rooms. It's a lot to take in, but

here we go.

Parental Control Options

Internet Service Providers (ISP's)

This is where you should start. Many ISP's today offer parents a

lot of choices for parental control. Many allow some type of

blocking and filtering of inappropriate websites and emails. AOL by

far has the best reputation for state of the art parental controls,

but many other ISP's are beginning to step up their efforts and

also offer options for parents.

Web Browsers

Both Internet Explorer and Netscape have built in, but limited

controls for parents to use. In Internet Explorer parents can set

limits by using their own criteria, criteria established by the

Recreational Software Advisory Council (RSACi) and SafeSurf, or the

rating system of another organization they trust. It is important

to note that both RSACi and SafeSurf rely on website owners to

voluntarily (currently there are not laws requiring them to do so)

rate their site, something that many choose not to do (both good and

bad sites) and since the web browsers automatically block anything

not rated it makes getting around on the web without a lot

of "blocks" very difficult. Netscape Navigator also sets

limits based on the criteria established by RSACi and SafeSurf, but

to the best of my knowledge do not allow parents to set their own

criteria or use the criteria of a rating agency other than the two

mentioned.

Blocking/Monitoring/Filtering Software

By installing blocking/monitoring/filtering software on your

computer you can control what your children see and do on the

internet as well as monitor what they are doing when you aren't

around. Most software packages today offer the capability to do

all three functions as well as offer protections for instant

messaging and chat rooms.

Blocking software allows the parents to block "bad" sites

from reaching their kids and many also allow parents to designate

"good" sites and only grant access to sites on the "good" sites

list. Software packages with blocking capabilities

usually have a list of predetermined "bad" sites and may

charge a monthly service fee to get the updated lists. If you go

this route, be sure to pick a package that also gives you the

ability to add to or customize the "bad" site list. There is

also blocking software that prevents children from sharing personal

information (address,phone number)with someone over the internet.

This can be helpful when your children start using chat rooms to

protect them from sharing personal information with online

predators.

Filtering software works off of a list of keywords (i.e. sex) to

block sites. Because it is very difficult for even the best

software programs to keep up with the multitude of sites being added

everyday, filtering works as a backup to the blocking function to

prevent any "bad" sights sneaking through to the kids. The

keywords are pre-set in the software and like the blocking option be

sure to choose a software package that allows parents to customize

the keyword list.

Monitoring and tracking software is a tool that allows parents to

keep track of everything the kids are doing on line including

reading emails, instant messages, seeing which websites have been

visited, and how long the kids have been on-line. Some software

packages even allow parents to control at which times of day and for

how long kids can be on the computer. This can be helpful for

parents who work outside the home and whose kids are home alone

after school. It is important to note that these monitoring and

tracking tools (if purchased in a stand alone package) don't

prevent kids from visiting certain sites, they just tell parents

where they have been and for how long.

Kid Search Engines

Also available to parents are search engines designed specifically

for kids. The search engines only access "safe" websites and

materials. These search engines are okay, but only until your kids

learn how to type in a new address in the address bar. There is

nothing built into these search engines to prevent them from doing

this.

Kid Browsers

Kid browsers are web browsers designed for children to use in place

of Internet Explorer or Netscape Navigator. They are very kid

friendly and filter out unacceptable sites. A couple of good ones I

have found are the Children's Internet and KidRocket.org.

Children's Internet charges $9.95 per month whereas KidRocket.org

though more limited is available through a donation of your choice.

Kid browsers are geared more toward younger kids (ages 3 – 10)

and older kids may find this type of browsers "babyish".

Resources for Parents

You should visit CommonSenseMedia.org. They are an independent

organization that reviews and rates websites, TV shows, video games,

movies, books, and songs for appropriateness for kids. They also

allow parents and kids to provide reviews as well. It is a good

resource if you want to hear what other people have to say about a

website your child is visiting.

Our Solution

After all my research, we have decided that for now to just set up a

few rules and monitor her on-line activities ourselves by reviewing

the history in her browser address bar and checking the emails she

receives and sends. As she gets older and her web surfing and

internet activities (instant messaging and chat rooms) more

sophisticated, we will have to consider more, but for now we think

this is enough.

For additional information on specific software recommendations and

ISP controls, visit us at

www.familieswithpurpose.com/internetcontrols.html