Overcome Shyness in 5 Small Steps

Self-ImprovementAdvice

  • Author John Malko
  • Published May 2, 2007
  • Word count 687

Are you a shy person? You're not alone!

In fact, everyone is shy. Some people are just very good at hiding their treu feelings. They don't want you to know they're shy! However, too much shyness could be detrimental to your social life.

Well, here are some steps to take in order to overcome your shyness. These steps will allow you to come out of your shell at your own pace and at your own will. Overcoming shyness can't be forced upon somebody. I t takes time. And small steps.

  1. Get to know yourself!

The best perspective is from the inside out when compared to looking from the outside in. Remember, you know yourself best. You don't know yourself best? Maybe that's the problem!

You have to be honest with yourselve. Look deep inside and ask: "Why am I shy"? For instance, are you particularly scared on how people will react to anything you do or say? Are you worried about your physical appeareance?

Please note there are certain reasons why you react the way you do on specific situations. Find the reasons. Maybe these can help you know yourself better and eventually help you change for the better. How can you expect your problems to change if you don't know the underlying reasons?

  1. Act confident. Grow confident.

If you want to be confident, act like you would act if you were confident. That sounds to easy, I know. How do you act confident?

In the privacy of your room, you could practice behaving like you are confident. Walk around with your chin up and chest out. This will make a huge difference, believe me!

Add a subtle swagger while you walk. Speak in a firm manner. Though this could feel ridiculous at first, this is one baby step to overcoming shyness. It is not ridiciolous. It only appears to be. Keep that in mind during your practice.

  1. Maintain eye contact

You have to practice eye contact with people. Look at them and smile at them. This is hard especially if you're trying to maintain eye contact with someone of the opposite sex. But note: This could open a world of possibilities. However, if you find this difficult, focus your gaze on the point in between the person?s eyes, particularly near his or her forehead. Or try to find out the persons eye color. But don't stare. Smile and keep contact for over 3 seconds.

You could also break the ice by striking up a casual conversation about the weather or any recent events in the news.

  1. Don't be afraid. There's no reason!

There is really nothing to be scared of. Nothing. Manage your fear of rejection. It will always happen. Nobody is perfect and rejection happens ALL THE TIME.

One good way to manage your fear s to imagine the worst social outcome in a given situation. After picturing this scenario, it is easier to think that nothing could be worst than that.

Try not to dwell on rejection. DON'T DWELL ON IT. I'm serious. It happens to anyone. Everytime. Move on and learn from it. A personal rejection is not the end of the world, and not the end of your ego.

  1. Don't take yourself to serious

This lightens the load from self-imposed pressure, like you have to look good, act, or be a certain way. You are a unique person. You can be whoever you want to be. It's your choice. Go with the flow.

Try not to be too critical of yourself. So you may not have the right dress on or your shoes are a bit too big, who cares? Nobody is perfect. Do not be bothered by these things. Life means more than your dress or social behaviour.

If you feel frustrated- feel it and let it go. Don't hold it. It's not worth it! Think positive and positive things will come. The good things you do, will reflect back to you.

To sum it up: The best way to overcome shyness is to have fun. Have fun and try not to be sad and the rest will come to you.

John is the owner of stop-shyness.com with more information on How to overcome shyness.

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