Part 1 of 3 of the Stressed Mommies to Successful Mommies Series

I recently read multiple postings by mothers that are so stressed out, that they would likely sell off one or both kidneys to be able to create more time and have more money to devote to themselves and their family.

These were just a handful of the situations:

"I’m a single mother, I work full time, I have a 7 and 4 year old, I’m exhausted when I get home, but then I have to do school work, laundry, make dinner, clean the house and then get ready to do it all over again! I have no time for myself!"

"I have three kids, I work full time, go to Grad school and still feel like I can never get ahead!"

"My husband is in the military and gone half the year, my son has lost all ability to potty train, and my daughter does exactly opposite of what I tell her to do!"

My heart just ached when I read all of these stressed out Mom’s postings. They were screaming for help onto a random forum posting, not knowing where to go, just hoping that someone would listen to their cries for help!

Are you this mom? Are you burning the candle at both ends? Are you crying for help and thinking that no one can help you?

1. Listen to the flight attendant:

The first rule here is just to be aware that if you are at this point in your life where you are hanging on by a thread, do what every good flight attendant suggests in the event of cabin pressure failure: "Put the Oxygen Mask on yourself first before you put them on small children." Easier said than done?

If you consider the reasons, you are like the HUB of the WHEEL of your family. You are what keeps the family together, ungreased, the wheel doesn’t turn well, it’s squeaky and sticky. With a well greased HUB, the wheel turns smoothly, effortlessly and can do more rotations than an ungreased hub. Consider your goal to be as smooth as a greased hub.

Taking care of yourself means doing what you need to do to stay healthy. Eat well, take time for yourself, exercise, meditate etc… Imagine what your family would do without you? If you are not taking care of yourself, you may continue down the road to sickness due to stress. So first things first –You are first!

2. Slow down to ½ speed!

It is easy to feel that because we have more to do, we need to do it faster, more hurried, and feel rushed. Yet, when we deliberately slow down the speed of our life, we are able to think more clearly and specifically about the task at hand. It really is a funny paradox! You may not actually be doing less tasks when you slow your reaction speed down, it just feels like it! What happens often is you feel more deliberate, your awareness comes into the present, and you can concentrate on the NOW task and not the FUTURE task.

3.Notice How Your Vibrations are Felt Through your Household Like ShockWaves:

Do you notice that when you have a bad day, and you are stressed, the moment you walk in the house, all of a sudden the kids are fighting and arguing, the dog is barking, there is chaos spreading like wildfire? Believe it or not, our energy levels have certain vibrational frequencies. Children are very sensitive to these frequencies and react in strange and curious ways, and usually ways that tend to sound like nails screeching across the chalk boards. Notice when you walk into your house calm, centered and peaceful? The house can sense your "centeredness", and mimics this energy level. Its one of those mysterious universal principles.

4.Use your transitional Times and Take Mental Health Minutes:

When time is a precious commodity for you at this time in your life, it is imperative that you use small portions of time to re-center, recharge and rejuvenate. You probably know this, but don’t mindfully practice this. So, now I challenge you to mindfully practice this. When you are driving home from work, put in peaceful calming music (I like to call it yoga music, easily downloadable from i-Tunes). When you take a bathroom break, take 5 minutes, close your eyes and do some deep breathing exercises and positive thinking.

5. Design Your Day:

This was a new concept recently introduced to me. At the beginning of the day, spend 2 minutes, grab your journal and decide consciously HOW you want the day to go, and HOW you want to feel. For example, "I choose to happily drive to work, I will use the free time in the car to relax. I choose to have joyous interactions with my coworkers. My meetings will go easily and I will have easy resolutions to my challenges today. When I leave work, I will happily use that time to transition and be prepared and centered for my family. I consciously choose to be present with my family in the evening, turning off my email and my phones." This only takes a couple of minutes, but you can see the impact that this has on your conscious and subconscious mind. One of the beauties of this exercise is that you will not script your day to say "I wish work is difficult, I wish the kids will be bad, and I want to be angry and stressed!" It just doesn’t work like that!

Do not expect that you will immediately practice all five steps right away. Take one step a day and practice. A mommy’s job is so important and vital to the health of the family. So mind your thoughts, mind your health and have fun!

Stay tuned to Part 2 Tips for Stress Management – Moving into Action to Reduce Your Stress

Let me know what’s going on with your stress!

Makenzie