Knowing how to get along with people is the single most important ingredient to success. And communication is to relationships what breath is to life. Here are 10 basic ingredients good communication, which if practiced well, will build relationships, open doors, improve confidence and create lasting friendships.

1.Be a good listener. Listening is the basis of all communication. It creates the channel by which true exchange can take place. It is a gift. " Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward, and we want to sit in their radius, When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand. " Karl Menninger One of the best ways to persuade other is with your ears- by listening to them. This ability to listen is so rare that if you have it, you will be welcome and appreciated everywhere

2.Be present. Give the person your total attention. Be present. Richards Atlas, on speaking of his grandson, says, " When I'm with him I'm totally with him. I'm not where I've been or where I'm going. When I was a father, although I was with my kids, I was usually somewhere else."

3.Have something good to say. See a need and fill it. Have an active interest in the other person and what's going around. " Words of comfort, skillfully administered, are the oldest therapy known to man" Louis Nizer.

4.Convey your message well. It is not just what you say, but how you say it. Your body language can speak louder than words. The head never hears until the heart has listened. Speak with passion, project warmth empathy and caring. People are more likely to be won over by what you do than what you say.

5.Take responsibility. Check the accuracy of what you have heard. This reassures the other person that you have been listening. For example, you may want to feed back what you have heard back to the speaker. If you are unsure, ask for clarification. Make sure the other has grasped your exact meaning. When listening, make sure that you fully understand what is said.

6.Be aware of existing barriers. There may be psychological barriers, for example. We have a tendency to hear only what we want and filter out what we find unacceptable. The emotions is another barrier. People who are feel insecure, anxious , suspicious or resentful are likely to distort what they hear.

7.Focus on the content. Even you find the language or ideas distasteful or offensive, keep listening. The other party won't open up to you if they think you are being prudish or judgmental.

8. Learn to read body language. Listen with your ears and your eyes. You may read more than you hear.

9. Learn to cope with silence. The speaker's mind is still active and often moments of profound insights take place. Resist the temptation to jump in. You may lose an important train of thought.

10.Build rapport. Listen. Understand. You may want to relate similar experiences and agree with the other person as much as possible. A common understanding is built between the individuals concerned. There will be a climate of trust which smoothes the interaction.

In mastering theses skills of effective communication we are building bridges that oils the wheels of human relations and touches lives. If used effectively, we can move the world.