Build Confidence. Seeing is believing; or is it? How clear is your vision? Is your reality based upon what you see or what you know? I frequently find myself marveling at how easily one automatically jumps to conclusions based upon prior self-belief, ideas and expectations, sometimes to the extent of rendering oneself blind to that which is clearly placed within our vision.

This effect of self-belief is seen in many different ways and in numerous circumstances. For example I found myself contemplating something earlier this week. We have had various people in our home carrying out a little bit of renovation and every time they have seen me I have been sitting on the sofa with my feet up, wearing comfy pants and a loose sweater, hair tied back, tapping away at my laptop keyboard for hours on end. What do you think they thought I was doing?

I bet they didn't think that I was at work. Perhaps they thought I was merely there so as to keep an eye on them, or that I was playing computer games, etc.

Malcolm Gladwell, in his book "Blink" cites many different cases of people making judgment calls "in the blink of an eye" most often without even realizing that they are doing so. We have a lot of preconceived ideas and self-beliefs stored within our minds, some of which we are aware and others which we are not. It is very important to be aware of this as it greatly affects both how we view situations and how others view us.

The HSBC advertisements which are emblazoned on billboards in airports highlight this fact as they play upon what is customary, and therefore expected, in different parts of the world. If you want to make a good impression, you need to be able to project yourself in a manner which another person will find to be pleasing, self assured and confident. Hence, for example, we tend to make a lot of effort prior to job interviews in deciding what to wear and what questions to ask, and so on. We do whatever we can to build interview confidence.

The preconceived ideas and expectations which we have are based not only upon customs, but upon our "social conditioning". If you hear or see something frequently enough you start to believe it, even without realizing it. It is really important to appreciate that this happens to us, because in effect these beliefs create a filtered lens through which we see ourselves and the world. Our self-belief, levels of confidence and expectations effectively block our vision to things which are contradictory.

In reality the majority of us see what we believe as opposed to believing what we see.

This is why to build confidence and to have a positive attitude is so very incredibly important. We only "see" people responding to us in the ways which we expect them to, through those filtered lenses of "prior knowledge", self belief and our own expectations. If you feel insecure, lacking in self assurance and low in self worth, and are therefore not sure whether people will like you or approve of you, you will "see" and feel a negative response, even when the opposite is actually the case.

As you build confidence and become more positive however all that you will see are good reactions and good outcomes; even if something is not quite going as planned you will manage to turn it around in your mind and think and feel positively about it.

Being confident makes life a lot easier; self-confidence allows life to be a fun and enjoyable learning experience, filled with self growth and opportunities. If your reality is shaped by your expectations, you may as well learn to expect the best and move forwards with confidence and self assurance.

Roseanna Leaton, specialist in hypnosis confidence mp3s which help you program your mind for success.

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