So, your partner spends more time on the computer than they used to. This is one of the classic signs he is cheating on you. You think that they are having an affair. What if they don't think they are having an affair? What if it has never crossed their mind?

Paranoia and insecurity has given online correspondence a really bad name. There are so many social connections being made worldwide and the human race is being drawn together in a much more communal way, that not all of it is going to be one person cheating on another.

Ask yourself this, is your partner spending more time online because their needs aren't being met at home? Are you in a position to meet their needs? Are you bogged down with work, elderly parents, child-rearing or home upkeep? Turning to the computer to connect with others is quite acceptable. Turning to the computer to avoid confrontation or to seek out an affair, is not.

Some people manage to have extra time and chose to spend it online. Others are seeking communities that have similar values, interests and hobbies. Online communication is convenient as there is no babysitter needed in order to have an adult conversation with another. Online, there is opportunity for the shy individual to reach deep inside and share their views with another and truly make a connection.

This brings us to the other part of this confusion. Is having friends of the opposite sex cheating? It is never quite answered in the movie When Harry Met Sally. Truthfully, mature men and women who have their stuff together have flourishing, platonic relationships with the opposite sex. Is there flirting? Possibly. The boundaries of the friendship have been established and with respect, those boundaries aren't crossed.

Whether or not there is cheating online is determined by the live relationship at home. Open, communicative relationships will fare much better, both online and in the outside world, that the paranoid and judgmental relationship where both parties are score-keepers and have a death-grip on each other.