How to Deal with Jealousy

Social IssuesRelationship

  • Author Martin S Tedjo
  • Published January 11, 2011
  • Word count 781

Jealousy, when it is in its tiny amount, may and can be advantageous in a romantic relationship. It can keep the romantic relationship strong or reignite the fire of love that has gone for long.

But, exactly like medicine, we can not swallow too much of it. If we swallow a medicinal drug more than necessary, instead of mending us or making us healthy, the drug can defile us. And certain strong medicines will even take out the lives of those who swallow them overly.

The same thing can be employed to jealousy. While a small, tiny amount of jealousy is coveted and many times called for, an extreme amount of it will be deadly to every relationship. It can even obliterate the most beautiful relationship unless something be done about it before too much damage done.

Thus, we should take command over our jealousy if we do not want it to lay waste our most valuable relationship. But, how to deal with jealousy? There are several treads that you can take for that. Let's find out some of them.

  1. Find out the thing that make you jealous.

What is it, the real cause, that can ignite the fire of your jealousy? Are you jealous when you discover your boyfriend talking with someone of different sex? Or do you feel insecure when you reckon that somebody reckons your better half as captivating?

Query that question to yourself but be frank to yourself when answering it. You may find that the issue lies, mainly, in you, not in your mate. Yes, because that is the true core of jealousy: fear. And fear always comes from within, never from the outside of us.

  1. Be open to your better-half.

When we are jealous, we are bent to cover it from our spouse. We may even behave as if we did not heed to the thing that had brought about our jealousy. If you oft do this, then don't get discouraged: you are not alone. Many other people out there play in the same way when they are jealous. Truly, admitting jealousy is ofttimes too embarrassing to do.

But, no matter how common it is, shrouding jealousy is not a good thing to do. If we conceal our jealousy from our mate, he/she may never be cognizant of it and may do and do again the thing that can cause ourselves jealous.

Not mentioning it and playacting as if you did not give a damn about it will not help you at all except more pain. It will cause you languish and, note this, if that passes again and again, eventually your burnings of jealousy will be bigger and fiercer until you are dissipated by it.

If that jealousy has lifted its awful head as a green-eyed monster, you will find yourself moving and conducting offensively. At that time, mastering the jealousy is no more easy. Thereupon, confess your jealousy as soon as possible so that your sweetheart can help you to surmount it before it grows to the extent of too huge to curb.

  1. Assure yourself to think more positively.

A jealous one is inclined to take the most hurtful possibleness on everything that comes off between her and her boyfriend/girlfriend. That's the thing that makes jealousy so harmful. Actually, it is this facet that often makes what the jealous one fear the most incarnates.

No one likes it to be enquired and/or cross-questioned every time he comes home after working hours, for example. An too jealous wife may ask her hubby for every last triviality he made at the office, who he contacted, where he had tiffin, with whom etc etc... not to bring up the privacy violation such as scanning his personal possessions.

Thus, you ought to train and discipline yourself to not accepting the most damaging odds on all that transpires. Understand that in casual world, innumerable affairs can comes to pass, and they are not all detrimental. Right things ensue as well as the aggravated ones.

  1. Assure yourself to have faith

Without trust, no relationship will deliver merriment. The role for every relationship should be to increase pleasures of the people involved in the relationship. The deficiency of trust will badly incapacitate the relationship and depreciate its purport notably. If you don't show trust to your partner, soon enough you may notice that your beloved-one no longer views his/her relationship with you as sacred as earlier and he/she might prefer to split up and finish the relationship instead.

Those are merely several undertakings you need to make in order to deal with your jealousy. Read more about them at the work noted beneath this article.

Excerpt from How to deal with jealousy.

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