ow to Fix a Relationship After an Infidelity, Being Caught Cheating or Having an Affair
- Author Blake Wilson
- Published February 21, 2011
- Word count 511
http://How-To-Fix-A-Relationship.net?infidelity-cheating-affairs
How to Fix a Relationship After an Infidelity, Being Caught Cheating or Having an Affair
So, you were caught with your pants down … or your skirts up?
Or, you walked in on or caught your loved one being unfaithful.
Sorry if you think this crude or offensive. But let's call it like it is, shall we.
Anyway, for purposes of this discussion we will NOT talk about the "whys". Instead we'll focus on what's next. And talk about how to fix the damage caused to your relationship.
Breaking the trust
This is the real damage of cheating and infidelity. Building trust can take years. Destroying it can be done in mere seconds.
And the longer you wait to start the repairs … the deeper the wounds … and the harder to fix a relationship.
So let's get started now.
If you were caught cheating, step one is to apologize (assuming you ARE sorry for your indiscretion).
One word of caution here -- do NOT lie about being sorry for your actions. You're working to rebuild trust and any insincerity now will derail your efforts.
Also, be especially careful not to get into an argument with your ex when you apologize. It's easier than you may think to get riled up (on both sides). So be VERY aware, calm, collected and HUMBLE.
And avoid becoming defensive, making excuses or trying to deflect blame to your Spouse or significant other.
In a word (or two) KEEP COOL.
If you were the one cheated on …
Resist the urge to lash out and put all the blame on your partner. I know this may be very hard - especially because you feel hurt and betrayed.
But if you believe there's a basis to fix this relationship … you too must work on helping your partner rebuild the lost trust.
In fact, (and I know I said we wouldn't talk about whys, but …) people sometimes have affairs because they are insecure and want to seek attention of other people (the fling). They may hope to be wanted, desired and loved … because they might have not found in you.
Once all the apologies have been made and things have cooled down you're ready for step two.
And, here's another warning, this step will be the MOST difficult.
Step two is to forgive and forget.
Without the ability to move forward, without laying ongoing guilt - one way or the other - the relationship will not stand a chance.
So, if you both believe your relationship is worth saving - and you want to try to fix your relationship and win back the love of your "Ex" - then you must take these two crucial steps.
This process may take some time to accomplish. But if both partners are committed, forgiving and really want a solid and loving relationship, it Will work out.
Do you truly want to fix your broken relationship and win back the one you love (your Ex)? If so go to http://How-To-Fix-A-Relationship.net?infidelity-cheating-affairs to get access to our free video resources.
Blake Wilson aims to help others to fix their relationships, save their marriages and win back the ones they love through his website at http://How-To-Fix-A-Relationship.Net.
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