Looking for a translation agency? Before you forge ahead, here is a story of someone I know, who searched for a translation agency himself. What happened to him can serve as a reminder to us all of the pitfalls of acting rash and without thinking.

When Tuki turned 21, he decided to try his luck at conquering the world. But straight off the bat, the road got bumpy right at the gate. All his documents to use for his immigration was in Russian, and he needed them all translated to English - since he was planning to move to the London. What he did next was something straight out of a comic book. He bought himself a Russo - English dictionary and tried to translate it all himself. The result, of course, was a hideous mass of words. After that debacle, it was then he decided to look for a translation agency.

What Tuki did then was go to the local Internet cafe and searched for certified translation services online. He found a few good ones, but for some odd reason. He chose to go with the lesser known ones. The ones that weren't recognized by any official body. His reason? Because he was for the little man. That they had something to prove, and thus, wouldn't fail him. Good intentions really, but remember; the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

So he stood by his decision and stuck with the small translation agency. He did a little correspondence with the company's spokesperson (who also was the owner, translator and tech support guy). When the company asked him to send money by wire transfer, instead of being leery, he agreed and sent them the "processing fee." But when the documents were being asked to be sent, at least he was thinking a little when he decided that maybe it is best to send them online. But that was the end of Tuki's rational thinking. Sure the company told him he could send the documents online, and Tuki immediately did.

Let's pause here for a minute and go over what Tuki did so far:

• Chose a small, non-accredited translation agency

• Sent a "processing fee" via wire transfer (untraceable by the way)

• Sent all his documents by uploading it, without thinking

The problem here? There's nothing wrong with a small agency, it's the non-accredited part that should be worrisome.

Paying by wire transfer? For a processing fee? I smell a scam.

Sending documents online without a second thought. Hmmm, unless you trust who you are sending to (which in this case, I wouldn't) sending your documents without thinking is just plain stupid. Identity theft is all the rage nowadays you know?

So what happened with Tuki? Long story short, he was milked off all his money. He did receive his translated documents, but they were shoddily made, not even certified, and looks like it was just typewritten on onion paper. Overall, a lesson learned for Tuki. A lesson he never got over.

But, if you want to be like Tuki, here are the things you should consider:

• DO NOT check the translation agency's background (Are they accredited? etc)

• DO NOT be sure of the security of your documents

• DO NOT ask what their final translation will look like, what it will include, etc

• DO NOT think for yourself and always agree to what they say

• DO NOT ask where and how the certification process is done

• DO NOT look for a guarantee of the company's good name

• DO NOT ask questions!

So there you have it. Certified translation services for the stupid. If you want to get ripped off, feel free to follow the guidelines above. However, if you want the best certified translation, be sure to know what you want and do what you can to ensure the safety of all parties involved.