You Cheated? How Forgive Yourself
- Author Teecee Go
- Published May 21, 2011
- Word count 463
If you cheat on your spouse, it will take a heavy toll on you, and you are likely to feel very bad with yourself. You will feel even worse if you truly love your partner. You may go through life feeling as if you are the very epitome of evil. This is why you should learn to forgive yourself for cheating if you want to move on with unclouded mind.
If you have cheated on your spouse, you will need to take measures that will help to repair your relationship. If you love your partner yet you cheated, it shows that there is something you needed that lacked in the relationship. You should take a critical look at your relationship to determine that missing ingredient and find ways of solving the matter fast.
There are some important decisions you will need to make when you want to forgive yourself for cheating. In case your partner is not aware of the affair, you will need to decide whether it is appropriate to talk about it or not.
Should you tell?
While you may feel that you should let your spouse know about your affair, you should weigh things well before you take the step. What is your real motive behind telling about your cheating? Are you trying to be open with your partner or do you just want to exorcise the ghosts that are haunting you? If it is the guilt you feel that prompts you to admit your cheating ways to your partner then you have started on a wrong footing.
You need to be very honest about the reasons why you want to tell your partner. Do not think that doing so will make it any easier for you to forgive yourself. You should learn to forgive yourself without involving your partner.
How do you start to forgive yourself?
Perform good things for other people, your spouse being one of them. The little things you do that show your thoughtfulness and kindness have greater impact that they are often credited for. They will go a long way in helping you to forgive yourself.
Forgive your spouse too
This may sound odd since you are the one who cheated on your partner. However, people do not often cheat just for the sake of cheating. If you went this far, there are high chances that there is something you were not getting from your relationship. You should therefore forgive your spouse for not giving you what you needed, which prompted you to have an affair. You should then teach yourself how to make your needs known so that your partner can fulfill them.
You will need to move ahead without getting stuck in the rut of thinking about your past failures all the time.
First you need to forgive yourself before taking the first steps necessary to get your spouse back. Even the relationship may already be so strained or your partner doesn’t know about the affair, you can give yourself a second chance by watching this FREE video: the magic of making up
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