It’s very difficult to identify a relationship that is abusive. We often tend to neglect or fail to understand the signs of abuse until one day it’s too late. Verbal and physical abuse most commonly occur in a relationship and most of the time the victims choose to stay quiet due to fear or other reasons such as insecurity or just ignorance of their legal rights. There are several questions that arise as a result. Below are the most commonly asked questions online:

Q. Can an abusive relationship cause physiological problems?

Physiological problems can arise if a relationship is abusive and is not detected early. These problems have to be dealt with in a healthy and healing way. Verbal and emotional abuse can be as traumatic as physical violence and may lead to many physiological problems. Emotional counseling can be a great healing option and can help an individual overcome the pain and trauma.

Q. How can an individual help his/her friend who is a victim of mental abuse and yet refuses to get out of the relationship?

You can contact the local services agency and they can help the individual. With the right kind of help, you can save a friend’s life. You can only guide a friend to the trained abuse professionals and hope that they get all the help they need. Even as an onlooker or a bystander, watching someone suffer in an abusive relationship can be very upsetting. The best thing to do is to consult a good lawyer and seek legal help.

Q. Can a victim of abusive relationship get a restraining order to freeze the marital assets kept in a bank, if he / she is planning to leave that relationship?

Both partners have equal rights if assets are in both their names. The bank generally provides an extra key when the safety deposit is in the name of both the partners. But if it’s in the name of only one partner then the safety deposit box can be accessed only by that partner. If that's the case, the other partner can ask for a court order to prevent the misuse, disposal or damage to the assets. This court order can help an individual protect his/her assets until some kind of property settlement has been decided upon. If the individual still feels unsafe and threatened by the abusive partner, he/she may also request for a protective order. This will keep the abusive spouse away till the court has taken a final decision in the case.

Q. As a parent, how to find a psychiatrist for an adult child that has been a victim of physical and emotional abuse and who has also been suffering from Stockholm syndrome?

Contacting the Local National Alliance for Mental Health would be the first step. To find the local office, the individual can visit the website www.nami.org. The individual will also find a number of support services and contact details including references of good psychiatrists on this website. There are several ongoing domestic violence support groups too that will help and assist the individual to deal with his/her situation.

Q. If someone is accused of domestic abuse and has been served with an order of protection, will they try to get a plenary order at the next hearing and if so, is a court appearance needed?

Any orders of protection, including a plenary, can be given by the judge ex parte. This means that the judge can pass a protection or plenary order even if the respondent is not present. When the individual is present in a court’s hearing, the judge gives him/her a chance to explain his/her side of the story. But if the individual is not present, then the court hears only the partner’s or spouse’s story. This could influence the court to such an extent that the judge might pass a judgment that is not in favor of the individual and might hurt the individual later. So there are chances of losing everything if he/she abstains from a court hearing.

We must be sensitive to the signs of a abusive relationships. It is also important to watch and hear the victims. An abusive relationship not just affects the two partners involved but even their children, families and close friends. However, help is available for victims, be it medical, psychological or legal.