Cursing 'Thees' and 'Thous': Why I Used To Flunk Literature

Reference & EducationPoetry

  • Author Salvador Paez
  • Published September 5, 2008
  • Word count 358

Don't you just hate studying Literature? When I was in high school (and even after) this subject was the absolute plague for me, together with similar subjects like Creative Writing and History. This was the only subject that required me to read hundreds of pages of the densest prose and dozens of lines of the most confusing poetry ever invented by man, woman or whatever beast I thought brought this plague into existence.

It all started when we started taking up Shakespeare. One look at Romeo and Juliet's first page almost got me into convulsions. I was amazed at how old the thing was and it really showed in the way it was written. What did I care about two young teenagers who became too horny for their own good? I was gearing up to be a mechanic and I was definitely not going to need all the 'thees' and the 'thous' to change someone's oil. It didn't help that the teacher was an ancient dude who spoke in whispers and would get totally

I just decided to read an old synopsis on the Internet for the test and as expected, I totally failed. I wondered why. I had memorized the old, musty character names. Romeo, Juliet, Tybalt, Mercutio... I memorized them all. I knew the basic plot. So how could I fail? I would curse the name of Literature (and Shakespeare) after that.

But after a few years, I fell in love. It was a forbidden love because her parents thought I was shit. Whatever I did, we just couldn't be together, no matter how hard I fought for the relationship. We went our separate ways and I fell into depression. It was in these dark times that I picked up Romeo and Juliet from under a stack of papers and finally got it...

Literature is more than memorizing names and phrases—it's a reflection of man's greatest experiences and ideas. It brought me great comfort reading those lines and it changed the way I looked at myself and the rest of the world. I'm now a confessed literary fan—who happens to be a mechanic too!

If you want to see more of the subjects you love to hate in a different light, check out: http://crunkish.com/category/article-pages/lifestyle/educational/top-10-subjects-students-love-to-hate/.

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Joe Hepperle
Joe Hepperle · 12 years ago
Great story. I was confused though about what you meant by writing that you '...finally got it'. Although your story and Shakespeare's both have a male and a female as the main characters, that's where the similarity seems to end. In Shakespeare's tale, both lead characters loved each other to the point that they would not endure life any further if they couldn't be together -- hence their suicides. You're still alive. What happened? I presume that your former flame is also still alive? What happened there? In Shakespeare's tale, both sets of parents disapproved of the union. In your recital of your experience, you say her parents thought you were 'shit'. Okay. But did your parents verbally besmirch your 'hottie', openly declaring that she was 'shit' too, or that she was 'beneath' you, or not a worthy candidate to marry their son? In Shakespeare's tale, the two main characters desired to marry each other. Did you propose to your 'hottie'? Did you confront her father, like a man, and ask for her hand in marriage? Or were you only looking to 'date' her, and got chased away? Really, I don't see any similarity in your story compared to Shakespeare's tale. Both stories have, as the main characters, one male and one female. After that, they diverge greatly. So, again I say I'm not sure what you think you 'got' from Romeo and Juliet. Modern jilted lovers sometimes utter that terrible phrase, "If I can't have you, then no one can (will)". But Shakepeare's characters have a mindset that is a 'man-bites-dog' kind of twist on that phrase. It was Juliet who said that if Romeo couldn't have her then no one would. And Juliet killed herself. It was Romeo who said that if Juliet couldn't have him then no one would. And Romeo killed himself. That depth of love and sincerity of devotion bears no resemblance whatsoever to your story. You wanted to date a hottie; You got chased off; She apparently wasn't really hooked on you either; You sulked for awhile; Then you moved on to your next female. You claim that you are a mechanic. All good mechanics know that if the part won't budge or the bolt won't unscrew, you don't move on to the next piece of equipment -- instead you get a BFH. But apparently, since you got chased off, you don't follow that principle of 'fixing' a problem. I don't intend to be mean or cold-heartedly cruel. I just don't see anything in the Romeo and Juliet story that bears any similarity to your story -- other than that 'one boy' and 'one girl' are the main characters.