Most people have a desire to be in a relationship; however some do not understand that relationships are fragile and easily torn apart for various reasons. A relationship is like an animal that needs attention, fed and nurtured in order to thrive. But, relationship break ups do occur on occasion. When they do they are painful and stressful events. If you are involved in a relationship that does eventually break up, you may be angry and contemplating getting back at your ex. However, is this really the best plan you can have? Perhaps the best or most successful ways that you can get back at your ex will not only put your ex in a bind, but will also repair the relationship with him or her by showing your ex how important you are and how important you were to the relationship. So here are 6 tips to get back at your ex. But they are also excellent tips for getting your ex back also.

1 - Communicate less. Communicating less often may seem counterintuitive to you, when you are thinking that your primary goal is rekindling the relationship, but it is one of the most important tips when you are thinking how to get back at your ex, or maybe thinking how to get your ex back. By breaking off communications with the ex you are letting them think awhile about your previous relationship, without you interfering. When your ex gets to thinking, they will contemplate your relationship and remember the good times.

2 - Be strong. Being a needy person is usually a turn off to an ex. You need to stop any kind of begging or clinging behavior that will make you look weak. Feeling desperate is natural in a break up but you need to not exhibit any behavior that indicates you are feeling desperate. You want your ex to think you have moved on and are doing well without them. Then your ex, who hopefully is thinking by now, will start to feel like they have not moved on.

3 - Get out of your house. You do not want to be alone right now. If you have friends that you can go out with, than call them and get out. Use this time to develop more social skills and for getting entertainment. You may or may not want to date others but you do need to enjoy time with friends, which will be very therapeutic. In addition, if your ex finds out you are apparently getting over the relationship quickly this will get them to seriously think they have lost a prize!

4 - Be yourself again. Try to find your old self again. Learn to go back to the way you were, and they way that your ex originally fell in love with you. Any old self-perception you can get back will get your ex to remember how good the relationship was and they will in turn get some of their old self back too.

5 - Be as flexible as possible. Being more flexible will allow better communication with your ex. Don’t set a deadline for them to move out or get their left over things, etc. You want to develop the habit of being a listener so that your ex will start to find you easy to talk to and more communicative. Your ex will be caught by surprise at this new side of you and will re-think his or her own decisions.

6 - Be mysterious. Be the type of person that your ex will be forced into thinking about simply because they are wondering what you are doing and why you never call, text or email. Curiosity gets the best of most people and when your ex gets curious about you they will be thinking about you more than ever and bothered by the breakup they had wanted.