Ex Boyfriend Calling - How To Contact Your Ex to Get Him Back
- Author Anthony Malibu
- Published July 14, 2009
- Word count 911
Dumped by your boyfriend but still in love with him? Looking for ways to get back together and continue the relationship? Contacting your ex is one of the hardest parts of fixing a break up. You have to know exactly the right time to contact your ex, and you need to do it in exactly the right way. The guidelines below detail the best rules for ex boyfriend calling.
Couples break up all the time, and couples get back together every day too. To get back with your ex, you only really need to accomplish one task: make your exboyfriend want you back. Of course, this task isn't easy. It takes time and patience, and the approach will be different for everyone. But as hard as it is, one of the first things you need to do is break contact with your ex. Dropping out of sight is the fastest way to make your ex miss you. You can't even email your ex, much less call or text him. Keeping in touch with your boyfriend right after he dumps you is always a bad move, as it puts you in the bad position of still being "around" for him, yet at the same time it makes him comfortable enough not to want to start dating you again.
Getting your ex back requires you disappear from his sight. Your boyfriend can't miss you if you're always around - by dropping out of view you'll quickly become a mystery to him. Don't sit at home either; go out, do things, and have fun. See your family and friends, carry on with life as normal. But what you can't do is show up places you know your ex will be. You can't talk to his friends, you can't drive past his house, and you can't have any kind of communication with him whatsoever. By letting time go back without seeing or hearing from you, your ex will begin to get nervous about the break up.
There's one thing many women don't understand about men who end a relationship with them: in a guy's eyes, no break up is ever final. Men love to fix things, break ups included. We always like to have the ability to change our minds, and this means leaving the door to the relationship ever so slightly open. We also like to be in control of that door. Once you start touching the knob and pulling it toward you? This makes us very uncomfortable.
While that door is in his control, your ex will keep on doing whatever he wants. This may include dating other girls. While you're still hanging around, he knows he can get you back at the drop of a hat. You need to shatter his illusion of this scene, and pull him out of his comfort zone. You do this by NOT contacting your ex.
When suddenly your exboyfriend doesn't see or hear from you for a while, he starts looking around for you. This is actually a great way to make your ex miss you. It worries him that you might be getting on with your life. It scares him that maybe you'll find someone else, and not want or need him anymore. Although he was the person who did the dumping, this is not what he wants. Eventually he'll start questioning his decision to end the relationship, and will want to undo the mistake before you end up moving on without him. Seeing an exgirlfriend get on with her life before you do? That's a guy's worst nightmare.
This is why you need to go out, have fun, get caught in public laughing and smiling and having a great time with friends. You haven't seen or called him, you haven't emailed: nothing. You're damaging his ego, and you're making him want you again. This is where you'll probably get a phone call, or a text-message, or maybe an email of your own. This puts you in a much better position, and now you hold the knob to that door. You can yank it open and surprise him, or you can pull closed even further, sending him scampering around trying to win you back. All this for doing nothing... for just disappearing from view and having fun.
When enough time passes, the rules of ex boyfriend calling dictate that you should contact him again. But only once you've got a reason to. Try to make one, and don't just call to say "hello" without an agenda. If you need to contact your ex, make sure you've got an innocent reason for making that call. Keep things casual and light: don't ask heavy questions or inquire about his dating situation. Don't tell him you were missing him or thinking about him either, unless he says those things to you. Even then, temper anything you might say with the knowledge that he's missing you, and you don't want to tip your hand all at once. Chances are, the two of you can arrange a time and place to hang out again. Maybe meet somewhere neutral for lunch - try to make it something quick and fun. Your first contact with your ex after the break up shouldn't be a long drawn-out date, it should be something that ends after a short time period which leaves you both wanting more. This type of reunion date is a great start on the path to getting back your ex boyfriend.
These are just a few ideas for winning your ex back. Be sure to check out the other ones at best ways to contact an ex. And for the complete, 8-Step guide on how to make your boyfriend want you back, visit Get Back An Ex Boyfriend!
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