Currently, the western world has a divorce rate of close to 50%. Some countries have an even higher rate. So why are we seeing an increase in divorce and how can marriage counseling help save marriage – yours and other peoples?

I think it's fair to say that the easier you make something the more often it will occur. If it becomes more frequent it loses its taboo and therefore becomes far more acceptable in society’s eyes.

My wife is from a divorced family. When she was a kid at school she was in the minority and it was a stigma. Now, my children are in the minority of those whose parents are still together. Of course, one of the major impacts of divorce is on the family. The impact on young children is often underestimated and we should recognize that even though one in two marriages may end – no matter how common, it doesn’t reduce the impact on the family.

Marriage counseling is form of therapy and conflict resolution. It is normally carried out by trained psychotherapist (though not always). For it to work properly both parties need to attend, though separate sessions will most likely be helpful.

If you are considering seeing a marriage counselor then here a few points to consider and questions to ask to help save marriage.

1. Is a first assessment session free?

2. How many times a week are needed?

3. Do you need to pay after each session?

4. Is the marriage counselor qualified?

5. Is the marriage counselor recommended by someone you trust?

6. How long will each session be?

7. Are you able to contact the marriage Counselor outside of session times?

8. Will the sessions fit in with your work schedule?

I am all for marriage counseling to save marriage, however, very often people are being paid huge sums to point out the blindingly obvious. In fact a lot of issues are screaming out to be noticed and normally have been by friends and family.

Of course, having an independent ear can be very useful - but you can achieve a huge amount yourself. With the right techniques, you can actually conduct your own marriage counseling.

© Copyright 2005 Steve Holloway