My Boyfriend Is A Jerk, But I Want Him Back

Social IssuesRelationship

  • Author Christine Imamshah
  • Published August 24, 2009
  • Word count 518

"My boyfriend is a jerk, but I want him back". How often have you heard this from one of your female friends? It's hard to understand why somebody would want to be with a guy that treated them like crap, but sometimes this the case. The problem seems to be growing all or the country, everywhere you go you are constantly hearing the same thing, "I want my ex boyfriend back, he may be a jerk but I just can't stop thinking about him", and other similar phrases. The problem goes much deeper than the guy being a so-called jerk; they're usually a few good qualities that'll make the girl still desire the so-called jerk. Let's examine some of those reasons.

He shows genuine care:

Often times no matter how much of a jerk a guy is there are still those times when out of nowhere he'll do something nice for you. Because those acts of caring don't come along as often as you may like them you appreciate them all the more when they do come along. This is a double edged sword in most relationships of this nature. The rare random act of kindness is seen as being genuine as opposed to phony or just something the guy is doing because he feels he has to. So even after the relationship ends and the girl ends up saying how much of a jerk the guy was, after some time she'll still end up saying "I want my ex boyfriend back", because even though he was a jerk he was still a good guy when it counted. This may seem unfair to all the guys who are good to their girlfriends from day one, but their kindness is seen as more of an obligation. Being genuine and honest can sometimes work against you.

He inspires intense emotion:

This is probably one of the strongest reasons why girls will still desire their ex boyfriends, even if the guy was a complete jerk. Oftentimes the guy in question inspired intense feelings of emotion in her that a lot of other guys either haven't or can't. And if you believe what you've probably been told by a lot of females then you believe, or better yet you know that women are often more driven by their emotions than anything else. So being able to push those emotional triggers is probably one of the strongest reasons why a lot of girls end up saying, even after a bad breakup "I want my ex-boyfriend back, even though he was a jerk".

You don't have to feel bad about wanting your ex boyfriend back. Just make sure the main reasons you want him back have to do with genuine caring and feelings and not just because you want to get him away from someone he may be seeing now. A lot of the time girls want what they can't have. So they'll want the guy back, even though he was bad for them, just because they don't want him to be with someone else. Make sure this isn't the game that you're playing.

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