Breathe deep and long breaths. Be sure to open your belly and breathe deep into your abdomen. You may not know it, but when you're angry you're panicking. This will help you to calm down. If you know how, pray. Pray for God to guide you through this dark time. Pray for the grace to see the beauty and vulnerability in the person you are mad at. Pray for the wisdom to see beyond the view of the person or situation that makes you so angry.

Another maladaptive way of handling your feelings, perhaps out of fear of losing control, is to work extra hard at keeping everything bottled up inside. What happens here is similar to what happens when a balloon keeps filling up with more and more air. The balloon will expand as far as it can and then eventually pop.

The body changes as anger rises. It changes in preparation to either fight or flee. The fight or flight response has been triggered when angry. By learning to notice these changes you can recognise anger triggers faster. This is a powerful anger management technique.

When people are angry their thinking is affected. Thinking is distorted because the brain is looking for information about possible threats. This causes biased thinking and means you will give more attention to negative signals when angry. Start to pay attention to the thoughts you have leading up to an anger outburst. Write them down.

Relaxation tapes are also good for reducing anger and anxiety symptoms. Many people with anger management problems also suffer from anxiety. Relaxation tapes teach you breathing skills and how to relax the muscles. Constant anger or tension causes the body muscles to ache. Exercise can help to reduce this and is the foundation of any good anger management program.

One of the best ways to diffuse your anger is to get physical. That does not mean hit your kids, which is one of the destructive ways some parents diffuse their anger. What I mean is to engage in some form of vigorous physical activity. Go for a walk, a run, lift weights, or do something else physical that will diffuse your emotions and get your mind off the problem. This will help you cool down.

When you are feeling stressed it is easy to have trouble controlling it. Do something that will ease the immediate feeling of pressure. It may mean you have to leave a situation. That is better than lashing out and being abusive to others.

Anger management classes are helpful for learning skills to reduce and control anger. You will learn about yourself and how to manage your thoughts, behaviours and feelings. To get the most benefit keep practicing after the classes end. If you still have problems consider individual counseling. Professional online anger management classes and counseling are now available as well as many excellent self help resources.