Jealousy in a Relationship
- Author Deborah Dixon
- Published May 21, 2010
- Word count 543
Jealousy is something that everyone experiences and can have a major impact on any relationship. It's not something that people choose to feel, it is a natural emotion that is perfectly normal, unless you allow it to take control of your life. When jealousy takes over your body, you end up acting out of character and doing things you wouldn't normally do. Not only is it an unattractive feature, it can lead to lack of trust in a relationship, eventually destroying a connection that you both had together. Small amounts of jealously can actually show how strong your feelings are towards another, therefore can actually be a positive sign in a relationship, however it is important not to let these small feelings grow and spiral of control.
When one person in a relationship becomes jealous, it is very difficult to control. The reason behind jealousy can be something small, such as one person in a relationship looking at another woman or man, even if completely innocent. Other reasons could be a partner talking a lot about their ex, especially if they are talking pleasantly about them. It can take just one small thing to happen and insecure feelings and emotions can develop. Those who have been betrayed in the past or who have low self esteem or insecurities about their appearance may find themselves prone to feeling jealous. Jealously while dating or in a relationship doesn't always occur due to feeling threatened by someone who could take your place, it can occur due to feeling threatened by a partner's job, children, hobbies, friends or even pets.
Signs of jealousy include, checking your partner's personal belongings, reading messages on their mobile phone and checking the call log, going through the phone bill, controlling what they wear out in public, forbid them from talking to certain men or women, asking a friend to keep an eye on them to make sure they aren't being unfaithful, following them to make sure they go where they said they were, calling them throughout the day to check up on them, and at worst punishing them in the form of physical damage.
Being in a relationship with someone who is jealous isn't easy. Although it can be frustrating, it is important not to be drawn into unnecessary arguments with them over their feelings. If you love your partner and wish to stay with them, then it is vital to listen to their worries and concerns and do all you can to reassure them.
Jealousy can affect any couple at any stage, whether just dating, in a relationship or married. Some people can control their emotions and have no reason to feel threatened. If you are prone to being jealous it is important that you realise your emotions could actually scare your partner away, which is probably your fear which has lead to the jealousy. Try to talk to your partner and explain how you feel. The sooner you talk to them about your feelings, the sooner they can start putting your mind at rest. If you don't feel you can talk to your partner, try confiding in a friend or family member. Acknowledging and admitting how you feel is the first step in dealing with your feelings of jealousy.
Deborah has been the head copy writer for Completely Free Dating for over 2 years offering help and dating advice to its members on all aspects of UK dating. Completely Free Dating is a free service for people looking for UK and Ireland dating, with absolutely no charges to any member at any time for any service.
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