Power Secret Three: Why You Will Not Be Able to Relate to Everyone

You need to know that for every 10 people who could potentially make a decision to interview you or hire you, the odds say that 3 out of the 10 will like you, and it will have nothing to do with who you are or what you do.

They may simply like your smile, your handshake, the sound of your voice, or the way you do your hair.

Rest assured that 3 out of those same 10 people will not like you, and again it will have nothing to do with who you are or what you do.

They may simply not like your smile, your handshake, the sound of your voice, or the way you do your hair.

And when you are hired, 4 out of those same 10 people will learn to like you, or dislike you, as they develop a working relationship with you.

The odds say that those 4 in 10 will like you if you actually do your job and then some, you work at earning their respect, you honor their confidence, and you treat them as you would want to be treated.

Considering these numbers, you will potentially be able to develop a very good working relationship with about 70% of your fellow employees when you are hired and go to work.

The other 30% you can forget, and if you bend over backwards to cultivate their good will, you will usually find that they always have a reason to whine or complain about what is happening to them, and why the world and the people in it are not treating them right. They are, in a word, negative. Your best positive attitude will not likely overcome their negative attitude. So forget about them, or they may do mental harm to your psyche.

Why do people like or not like you based upon things that really have little to do with your skills and abilities?

The simple answer is that people are not always rational. People are filled up with prejudices, beliefs, foibles and idiosyncrasies. They will continually tell you that cat is spelled "kat" even when you lead them to a dictionary and show them that cat is spelled "cat". They may see but choose not to recognize reality, or truth. A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still. A woman convinced against her will is of the same opinion still.

Under the category of "people are not always rational" is also the phenomenon of "life is not always fair.”

For those of us who have been paying attention, life is not fair, and unfairness (or discrimination) is no respecter of race; no one is immune. People of any race are just as apt to be unfair to a person of their own race as they would to a person of another race, they are just less obvious about doing so.

A good example of this would be Karen, a woman who went to a job interview, had a fantastic experience at the interview, and came away feeling good about herself, and her prospects of being hired.

She knew that the company representatives liked her, and would offer her a job. She did not get the offer. Later she learned that everyone liked her, but the key decision-maker axed her hiring, even though he clearly liked her as a possible hire at the interview.

What Karen did not know was that the key decision-maker was going through a nasty divorce and child custody battle, and his ex-wife's name was Karen. He simply did not want to come to work every day and have to smile at this Karen and say, "Good morning, Karen, how are you doing?" Such is life.

Power Secret Four: Be Careful About From Whom You Take Your Advice

Always remember that the cheapest commodity in the world is opinions. Everyone has one, and if you do not think so, just ask them, and he or she will tell you.

Ask a lot of questions and even solicit opinions, but be careful about from whom you take your advice.

Some displaced workers making $100,000 a year get pushed out the door during a merger, acquisition, restructuring or downsizing (all words for the same negative impact on the individual involved), head down to the local watering hole, ask some unemployed, broke person for advice on what to do next, and then actually listen as if the unemployed, broke person could tell them how to become financially successful in life.

The sources of advice are all around us: fellow employees, those who did not get axed, your friends, your relative who has never had a job, your pastor, and, if you are desperate enough, your dog Spot.

When you want advice, never go back down the success ladder, always climb higher until you reach someone more successful or accomplished than yourself in a certain area. Let someone with experience, expertise and success suggest meaningful actions that can actually produce potential results.

Always remember that when you take your advice from anyone, they are not going to hire you. Nor would you hire yourself.

Seek advice from those who are competent through their own experience and success to give it.