We have all been there, a bad relationship break up; it’s heartbreaking and can be really difficult to deal with. But what do you do when it’s your friend going through the break up, what do you say and do, it can be really difficult to handle the situation and help your friend.

Your friend really needs someone to listen to them right now, they need to explain, sometimes in minute detail exactly what has happened, how the break up happened, how the relationship has been going over the last few months, what their ex partner said before, after, and during the break up. Talk with your friend and listen, be patient and try and understand what they are going through.

Personally I would try and be impartial about any comments you may make about their ex partner, as so often is the case that couples get back together, and any negative comments about their ex will stay with your friend should they get back together.

Listen and talk through what the problems are and maybe think of other solutions that your friend may not have thought to their problems. Encourage your friend and tell them what their best qualities are, their self esteem may have been affected, so do your best to make them realise what a great person they are, this really does help as they will respect your opinion more than you think.

Avoid clichés "There’s plenty more fish in the sea" or "You’re better off without them" or my favourite "Everything happens for a reason", these don’t really add anything to the conversation and may make your friend think that you don’t really care too much as these are sayings that mean nothing.

Sometimes there is no solution and the relationship is over for good, this is the hardest thing to deal with and can sometimes be on par with grieving. Your friend may experience shock, denial, anger, blame, frustration, depression, elation any one or all of these emotions over the next few weeks that’s a lot for anyone to deal with and can be draining for them, and also for you if you are with them all the time.

Initially they will want to talk, grieve, cry and do nothing but they will appreciate you being there for them , you might even offer to stay over for the first night or so and watch films (avoid the tear jerker’s) play computer or board games anything to try and get their mind off of their problems.

If your friend is really down and you are worried about them, try and convince them to seek professional help or speak to a counselling service and see if there is anything you can do to help.

Try and get other mutual friends involved as well so that you can take it in turns to be there for your friend, this will help your friend going through the heartache as well, as they will want to talk about the break up over and over again while they try and process and come to terms with what has happened.

We all play our own parts in a social network and your advice may be different from that of other friends, this is what your friend going through the break up needs, many different opinions and the advice of others. This will help them view their relationship in different lights and come to their own decision about what has happened.

Eventually your friend will start to feel better, at least want to start going out again. It is your job to encourage your friend to go out, organise days and nights out etc. Even if you have no money, try and organise free things to do like walking in the park, going for a run, anything to keep your friend occupied. Maybe convince them to join the gym as this gives them something to do and will also make them feel better about themselves both physically and mentally, exercise is a great stress release.

Everyone copes with break ups in different ways, and all you can do as a friend is talk, listen and be there for them and most importantly make them laugh as only friends can.