Too much has changed in the way we live our lives and in the way we perceive old social norms. Therefore, popular myths of divorce that have been passed down over the years are not necessarily relevant or true any more. The main change has been that men and women establish relationships on a far more equal footing than ever before.

Initiating Divorce

It is a commonly held myth that majority of divorces are initiated by men and that women are unwilling to separate. However, that is a rather drastic statement and not really a reflection of how things are. Women might make a greater effort at making a marriage work and be willing to compromise more. When they have given the relationship a hundred percent commitment and feel that nothing can save the marriage, they are quite likely to throw in the towel and walk out.

Men, on the other hand, can remain in denial for a long time and not necessarily make the effort required to make the marriage work. When things fall apart they find it difficult to come to terms with the fact that the marriage has ended. They are also more inclined to be creatures of habit and like to know that there is a home and family to return to

It is difficult to make a definite statement about who is inclined to initiate divorce more often. Earlier, even if a woman wanted to get divorced, she was far too dependent on a man financially to make the move. Modern women have equally successful careers and will not suffer a bad marriage just for financial reasons. Divorce and the reasons behind it, are purely circumstantial and only the two people involved know the whole truth. Who initiates divorce depends largely on what goes wrong with the marriage.

Women Suffer More Financially

If a man and a woman have similar earning power and both continue working after marriage, getting divorced doesn’t alter either of their financial standings too much. If they have jointly invested in property, have joint accounts and contributed equally to running a home, then parting ways would mean dividing the assets equally.

If a woman gives up a lucrative career or is financially dependent on her husband, then she could stand to suffer financially after a divorce. Event if a settlement has been made, to start her career and begin to take financial responsibility for her life again, can be very difficult.

There are, however, women who get a fancy settlement and have a better life than they could’ve ever had if they’d been single to begin with. Again, financial settlements and income are purely circumstantial. Generally, it might appear that women do suffer more financially than men after divorce.

Judgments Biased Towards Women

Women are always viewed as the gentler and more emotional of the genders. Historically, women have faced several atrocities and have had to put up with emotional and physical abuse by men. Earlier, it was more likely that a man would be more inclined to being unfaithful than a woman. Also, economically women were completely dependent on men. Therefore, the laws in place have a tendency to be biased towards woman and look out for their protection.

Circumstances have changed and women are not helpless and long suffering individuals anymore. They know what they want and how to get it. They are capable of giving as well as they get. The law, however, still sees women as hapless souls incapable of fending for themselves and, therefore, remains biased towards them. This may not always be fair, as there are times that a man suffers more in the marriage but doesn’t get too much sympathy from the law.

Conclusion

What brings two individuals together and what drives them apart, is the consequence of a series of circumstances. Yes, it is true that women are more inclined towards a set of behavioural patterns and men another broad set. However, it would be simplistic to attribute reasons for divorce to how women usually behave or how men usually behave. Every individual is different and there is no stereotype where divorce is concerned. It is an emotional and painful time that goes way beyond which gender a person belongs to. Divorce happens because two people are not happy together anymore and that is the singular truth.